Season 7 E 5 • 04/16/2003
Ben Affleck is in love with Jennifer Lopez, and their afternoon leads to more than just taco-flavored kisses.
Bring the ShizzleSouth ParkS7 E4
Both Sides or the War Protest have a meeting at the Mayors office. She decides they must protest together,
Cartman in 1776 (Music Montage)South ParkS7 E4
Cartman successfully electrocutes himself back to 1776. Then he sings a song about how much he hates Stan and Kyle.
Official Messenger BoySouth ParkS7 E4
In his flashback, Cartman beats up a messenger so he can meet Thomas Jefferson and deliver the Declaration of Independence but he's really in a coma.
Only 2 Left in The Study GroupSouth ParkS7 E4
The anti-war gang enlists the boys to give a presentation at their rally, but Mr. McCormick and the pro-war guys take Kenny away.
Thursday: Free Ice Cream DaySouth ParkS7 E4
Cartman delivers the Declaration of Independence to Congress. He sticks around for the reading of it.
How Very Very RelevantSouth ParkS7 E4
Cartman watches as Congress argues over whether or not to declare war.
SUPPORT COUNTRY PROTEST ROCK N ROLLSouth ParkS7 E4
Stan and Kyle come unprepared to the rally. Then a fight breaks out.
Saying One Thing and Doing AnotherSouth ParkS7 E4
Congress reaches a decision about the war. They decide to have their cake and eat it too. Then Cartman wakes up.
Suck My Culo, ChicaSouth ParkS7 E5
J-Lo and Ben Affleck go to South Park Elementary. J-Lo beats Cartman but it seems like Affleck is falling in love with the hand.
Don't Forget The Hot Sauce, ChuloSouth ParkS7 E5
Cartman/J-Lo record some tracks. Later that night the J-Lo puppet keeps Cartman up while practicing her dance moves.
Hand Lovin'South ParkS7 E5
Ben Affleck is in love with the new Jennifer Lopez, and their afternoon leads to more than just taco-flavored kisses.
Will I Dream...South ParkS7 E5
Cartman gives up and tells everyone that his hand is really a con man named Mitch Connor. When the authorities leave, he admits it was all a joke.
Taco-Flavor KissesSouth ParkS7 E5
Cartman makes a music video at the mall featuring his J-Lo hand-puppet. It gets sent to a major record label and the execs love it.
I Eat Tacos & BurritosSouth ParkS7 E5
The class does presentations about Latin American culture for the Latino Endowment Committee. The committee likes Cartman's presentation.
Ms. Lopez Gets SignedSouth ParkS7 E5
BHI calls up Cartman and talks to his hand, J-Lo. They ask her to write 10 more songs. Cartman dreams of proving Kyle wrong.
Jennifer Lopez Gets DroppedSouth ParkS7 E5
J-Lo is dropped from BHI. The execs tell her about the other J-Lo and she decides to go to South Park to "kill that bitch."
Taco Flavored Kisses For My BenSouth ParkS7 E5
Ben Affleck shows up at Cartman's house and spends day with J-Lo. J-Lo sings a song and then things get steamy.
Can I Have Your TacosSouth ParkS7 E5
J-Lo finds Cartman and beats up his hand. The doctor fears for Cartman's sanity. Ben Affleck and the J-Lo puppet are now engaged.
J-Lo Has A ChainsawSouth ParkS7 E5
Cartman asks the boys for help and they turn him down. Then the real J-Lo comes after him with a chainsaw.
The Missing PieSouth ParkS7 E6
The boys are having trouble finding crimes to solve for their new detective club. They do manage to make a dollar solving the crime of the missing pie.