Story

Description

Kyle is upset when his parents won't let him go to the "Raging Pussies" concert with all the other boys, and angrily wishes he didn't have any parents. Cartman suggests he call the police and claim they're "molestering" him. Kyle does it, and his parents are immediately carted off to prison. The arrangement looks so appealing that soon every child in South Park accuses an adult of "molestering." The grownups are all hauled away, leaving the town in the hands of the kids.

Sometime later a couple named Mark and Linda are passing through South Park when their car breaks down. The town has become a desolate, post-nuclear-family wasteland divided into two warring factions -- one led by Cartman (Smiley Town), the other by Stan and Kyle (Treasure Cove). Their main disagreement is over how to worship The Provider -- a 20-foot-tall statue of former Denver Broncos quarterback, John Elway.

The out-of-towners convince the kids that the "birth givers" (their parents) from "the before time" are necessary evils. They're also stunned to learn that the grownups have only been gone 10 days. The kids agree to tell the police they were lying about the "molestering." The parents return, but intense therapy while in prison has convinced them that they did, indeed, molest their children. They promise not to do it again. Then the boys wander off to build a snow igloo.

What I Learned Today

"Things were a lot better with our parents around."

Memorable Quotes

• "Parents can be pretty cruel sometimes, dude. They get off on it." Stan
• "When I wanted to get rid of my mom's last boyfriend, I just called the police and said he was molestering me, and I haven't seen him for three months." Cartman
• "Having no parents is awesome!" Stan
• "Snow igloos kick ass." Cartman
• "You can go to the Raging Pussies concert if you clean out the garage, shovel the driveway, and bring democracy to Cuba." Sheila Broflovski
• "OUTLANDER!! WE HAVE YOUR WOMAN!!!" Mayor Cartman
• "I'm gonna be sacrificed to the Provider!!" Butters
• "Be careful, Mark! They'll make you disappear with the M word!!" Linda Cotner
• "Alright, fine Kyle... You can go to the Raging Pussies concert if you clean out the garage, shovel the driveway and bring Democracy to Cuba." Sheila

Characters

Stan Marsh

Kyle Broflovski

Eric Cartman

Kenny McCormick

Ike Broflovski

Butters Stotch

Craig Tucker

Francis (4th Grade)

Gerald Broflovski

Sheila Broflovski

Jenny

Filmore Anderson

Randy Marsh

Sharon Marsh

Mrs. McCormick

Stuart McCormick

Liane Cartman

Stephen Stotch

Character Debuts

Butters' parents, who in light of their somewhat cavalier attitude toward his physical and emotional well-being in coming episodes, seem very concerned about him in this show.

Linda Stotch

Mark and Linda, a married couple that gets stranded in Smiley Town/Treasure Cove. We also briefly meet Fidel Castro.

Mark and Linda Cotner

Body Count

Kenny, whose corpse lies at the feet of the town's 20-foot-tall statue of John Elway. There's also a couple other dead kids at the base of the statute. Butters, although more than willing, narrowly avoids being sacrificed to The Provider.

Locations

City Hall

South Park Elementary

Original Songs

Kyle sings to bring democracy to Cuba with his song "One Wish". It's so powerful, it single-handedly causes Fidel Castro to make Cuba democratic.

Behind The Scenes

Originally Matt and Trey planned to have Cartman build a huge shield that blocked the sun from the side of town he didn't control. But at the last moment they discovered that The Simpsons had already done something similar.

Pop Culture References

Bonus Factoids

Pointless Observations

Craig dresses up as an astronaut and plays Spaceman. Mark calls him "Spaceman Spiff" -- a reference to a similar character in the comic strip Calvin and Hobbes.

After Castro decides to make Cuba into a democracy and allow American tourists, the newscaster reports that "plans can finally resume for Knott's Berry Farm, Cuba". Knott's Berry Farm is a popular theme park located in California.

When parents are being rounded up, Chef is one of two half-naked men escorted out of Mrs. Cartman's house. Pop Culture References: The episode borrows from the movies Children of the Corn, Mad Max: Beyond Thunderdome and Logan's Run. Also the episode "Miri" from the original Star Trek series.

Bob Seger's "Old Time Rock n Roll" blasts during the child molestering montage. The first scene, where Kyle slides into the living room in his underwear, is taken directly from the classic Tom Cruise film Risky Business.

Outside of the Mayor' Office in Smiley Town is a huge blow-up King Kong replica, complete with an airplane in it's grips.

When the Prison Counselor is trying to speak with all the Parents about their uncontrollable child-molesting urges, he pulls out a life-sized black-and-white cutout of Jerry Mathers as "the Beaver" (from Leave it to Beaver). The Counselor also uses the phrase "Help me, help you", which is a famous quote from the movie Jerry Maguire.

Season 4

e1 Cartman's Silly Hate Crime 2000

e2 The Tooth Fairy's Tats 2000

e3 Quintuplets 2000

e4 Timmy 2000

e5 Pip

e6 Cartman Joins NAMBLA

e7 Cherokee Hair Tampons

e8 Chef Goes Nanners

e9 Something You Can Do With Your Finger

e10 Do the Handicapped Go to Hell?

e11 Probably

e12 Fourth Grade

e13 Trapper Keeper

e14 Helen Keller! The Musical

e15 Fat Camp

e16 The Wacky Molestation Adventure

e17 A Very Crappy Christmas