Cherokee Hair Tampons
Kyle is deathly ill and needs a new kidney. His mother insists upon treating his condition using New Age medicine, which she learns about at a new holistic healing shop run by a woman named, Miss Information. Miss Information gets many of her products from two "Native American" men named Carlos Ramirez and Chief Running Pinto (played by Cheech and Chong). Their offerings include the episode's namesake, Cherokee Hair Tampons.
Meanwhile, Mr. Garrison (thanks to his escapades in "Cartman Joins NAMBLA") has lost his teaching job. He decides to try his hand at writing a romance novel, but an editor at Harequin states that it's a bit too "gay" for his mostly female audience, since it includes 6,083 references to penises.
Cartman, it turns out, is the town's only viable kidney donor for Kyle, but he refuses to give one unless he gets $10 million. Undaunted, Stan tries to cut a kidney out of Cartman while he sleeps, but is thwarted by a protective device he wears called a Kidney Blocker 2000.
Kyle gets worse, so his mother takes him to Miss Information's store for a consultation with Carlos Ramirez and Chief Running Pinto. The men, aghast at the boy's condition, tell her to take him to a hospital -- and further admit that they're Mexican rather than Native American. Kyle gets a kidney from Cartman, who is conned into surrendering one. Mr. Garrison's novel, called In The Valley of Penises, is published to great acclaim.
What I Learned Today
"Being in touch with the earth has nothing to do with dying, man."
- "Don't get too close to Kyle. He looks like he might have the AIDS." Liane Cartman
- "Cartman, you are SO going to Hell when you die." Stan
- "Let the wonders and the mysteries of our people, like, change the way you think about tampons." Tommy Chong
- "Women want to read about ding-dongs." Mr. Garrison
- "I just think that taking a woman home and getting some hot poon is about the greatest thing in the world." Mr. Garrison
- "It felt good. Like a penis. A soft, but sturdy penis that felt warm to the touch." An excerpt from Mr. Garrison's book
- "I hope it's not too bloody, I'm wearing my favorite pants." Butters
- "This is what we in the book publishing business like to call Gay. Really, REALLY gay." Book Publisher
- "You never care when I die!!" Kenny
- "Hippies... They're everywhere... They want to save the Earth... But all they do is smoke pot and smell bad... Hellllppp..." Cartman
Mr. Wyland, the substitute teacher who replaces Mr. Garrison.
Miss Information, an older hippie woman that runs the New Age store.
Chief Running Pinto and Carlos Ramirez, the two "Native Americans" that peddle their goods to Miss Information's store.
Miss Information, beaten to death by her customers when they learn that Cheech & Chong are Mexicans, rather than Native Americans. And Kenny. A piano drops on his head as he walks away in disgust from Stan, who is crying over Kyle's impending death -- something he's never bothered to do during Kenny's endless demises.
Behind The Scenes
Where Did The Idea Come From
It was a dig on New Age medicine inspired by one of South Park's writers, who announced that she was ridding her body of "toxins" by consuming cayenne pepper and lemon juice. However she couldn't explain what those "toxins" might be, or how cayenne pepper and lemon juice helped.
Pop Culture References
Cartman, when asked if he'll donate a kidney to Kyle, breaks into a joyous song that's just a series of 'No's." The melody is taken from Comedy Tonight, a tune from the musical A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum.
This episode features a live-action commercial for "Cherokee Hair Tampons". Within the commercial, a bloody scene from The Shining is referenced.
A townsperson seeks holistic healing from Miss Information's shop, complaining of "a bit of pain in my balls whenever I watch VH1."
- Appearing on South Park was the first thing Cheech & Chong had done together in years. Also, this is the first time Cartman's pig Fluffy is seen since "An Elephant Makes Love To A Pig".
- When Garrison is told by the School Board that he must take a hiatus from teaching, he takes out his "gun and badge" and puts it on the table. This is an homage to what typically happens to people "kicked off the force" in Cop dramas.
- We learn a bunch of medical stuff about the boys: Kyle is diabetic; Kyle and Cartman are blood type AB Negative (the only two in South Park); and when Cartman laughs too hard, milk shoots out of his nose even if he's not drinking milk. Later, he says it's due to his "crappy kidney", which Kyle winds up getting.
- There's a picture of Garrison's parents hanging in his bedroom. We meet them in "World Wide Recorder Concert". In Cartman's hallway, there's a picture of his Grandparents and his cousin Elvin, who are introduced in "Merry Christmas Charlie Manson".
- Garrison's penname is Ethan F. Garrison (even though his first name is Herbert); he uses it for his best selling novel "In the Valley of Penises".
- Although there are four episodes where Cartman rescues Kyle, this was the first time he saved Kyle exclusively. After holistic medicine fails, the boys trick Cartman into giving Kyle a much-needed kidney transplant. The other three are Smug Alert, Roger Ebert Should Lay Off The Fatty Foods and Imaginationland Episode II.
- e1 Cartman's Silly Hate Crime 2000
- e2 The Tooth Fairy's Tats 2000
- e3 Quintuplets 2000
- e4 Timmy 2000
- e5 Pip
- e6 Cartman Joins NAMBLA
- e7 Cherokee Hair Tampons
- e8 Chef Goes Nanners
- e9 Something You Can Do With Your Finger
- e10 Do the Handicapped Go to Hell?
- e11 Probably
- e12 Fourth Grade
- e13 Trapper Keeper
- e14 Helen Keller! The Musical
- e15 Fat Camp
- e16 The Wacky Molestation Adventure
- e17 A Very Crappy Christmas