Editing The Wacky Molestation Adventure (section)

==Story==

===Description===
Kyle is upset when his parents won't let him go to the "Raging Pussies" concert with all the other boys, and angrily wishes he didn't have any parents.  Cartman suggests he call the police and claim they're "molestering" him. Kyle does it, and his parents are  immediately carted off to prison. The arrangement looks so appealing that soon every  child in South Park accuses an adult of "molestering." The grownups are all hauled away, leaving the town in the hands of the kids.

Sometime later a couple named Mark and Linda are passing through South Park when their car breaks down. The town has become a  desolate, post-nuclear-family wasteland divided into two warring factions -- one led by Cartman (Smiley Town), the other by Stan and Kyle (Treasure Cove). Their main disagreement is over how to worship The Provider -- a 20-foot-tall statue of former Denver Broncos quarterback, John Elway. 

The out-of-towners convince the kids that the "birth givers" (their parents) from "the before time"  are necessary evils. They're also stunned to learn that the grownups have only been gone 10 days. The kids agree to tell the police they were lying about the "molestering." The parents return, but intense therapy while in prison has convinced them that they did, indeed, molest their children. They promise not to do it again. Then the boys wander off to build a snow igloo.

===What I Learned Today===
"Things were a lot better with our parents around."

===Memorable Quotes===
* "Parents can be pretty cruel sometimes, dude. They get off on it." [[Stan]]
* "When I wanted to get rid of my mom's last boyfriend, I just called the police and said he was molestering me, and I haven't seen him for three months." [[Cartman]]
* "Having no parents is awesome!" [[Stan]]
* "Snow igloos kick ass." [[Cartman]]
* "You can go to the Raging Pussies concert if you clean out the garage, shovel the driveway, and bring democracy to Cuba."  [[Sheila Broflovski]]
* "OUTLANDER!!  WE HAVE YOUR WOMAN!!!"  [[Mayor Cartman]]
* "I'm gonna be sacrificed to the Provider!!"  [[Butters]]
* "Be careful, Mark!  They'll make you disappear with the M word!!"  [[Linda Cotner]]
* "Alright, fine Kyle... You can go to the Raging Pussies concert if you clean out the garage, shovel the driveway and bring Democracy to Cuba."  [[Sheila]]