Editing Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics (section) Warning: You are not logged in. Your IP address will be publicly visible if you make any edits. If you log in or create an account, your edits will be attributed to your username, along with other benefits.Anti-spam check. Do not fill this in!==Story== ===Description=== A collection of timeless holiday songs handpicked from ''South Park'''s Christmas album called ''Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics''. Mr. Hankey serves as the narrator, sitting in a tiny chair in front of a fireplace. After each commercial break, a news anchor announces "Fighting the frizzies at eleven". The musical acts begin with Cowboy Timmy and a choir of kids introducing Mr. Hankey ("Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo"). Then Kyle, his family, Cartman and Stan sing in counterpoint about playing with a dreidel ("[http://southpark.cc.com/clips/103389/hanukkah Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel]"). Hitler sobs about not having a Christmas tree in Hell ("[http://southpark.cc.com/clips/103390/hitler-sings#source=473fef35-48a7-434c-afc6-207874c7f1a3:5fd73616-ecfd-11e0-aca6-0026b9414f30&position=2&sort=playlist O Tannenbaum]") and so Satan comforts him and all of Hell's residents ("[http://southpark.cc.com/clips/103390/hitler-sings#source=473fef35-48a7-434c-afc6-207874c7f1a3:5fd73616-ecfd-11e0-aca6-0026b9414f30&position=2&sort=playlist Christmas Time In Hell]"). Mr. Mackey performs all four parts of "Carol of the Bells" with his "m'kay" verbal tic while dressed as a bell. Cartman incorrectly sings about the birth of Jesus in favor of presents ("O Holy Night"). Mr. Garrison teaches an infamous lesson about how Christmas is celebrated in different parts of the world ("Merry Fucking Christmas"). Shelley sings her simple rendition of "I Saw Three Ships" while Stan and Kyle make fun of her behind her back. Jesus and Santa performs a [http://southpark.cc.com/clips/151730/santa-and-jesus#source=473fef35-48a7-434c-afc6-207874c7f1a3:5fd73616-ecfd-11e0-aca6-0026b9414f30&position=8&sort=playlist Christmas medley of holiday songs] as lounge singers. Lastly, Mr. Hankey and the entire cast sing together a final Christmas song as tribute to the late Mary Kay Bergman ("[http://southpark.cc.com/clips/151731/time-to-go-mr-hankey Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas]"). The episode ends with the news anchor boxing a frizzy monster while "Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel" plays. ===What I Learned Today=== "Instead of our normal thing, we're just gonna sit back and enjoy some holiday songs! And if you don't like it, well I guess you can suck my tiny little balls." ===Memorable Quotes=== * "Joy to the world, for I have come. Let earth receive me." ([[Jesus Christ]]) * "Ah, fuck you, Jesus." ([[Santa Claus]]) * "Stick me in your mouth and try to say 'Howdy Ho, Yum Yum Yum'!" ([[Mr. Hankey]]) * "Sometimes he hangs off the end of your ass and won't fall in the toilet, 'cause he's just clinging to your sphincter and he won't drop off and so you shake your ass around and try to get it to drop into the toilet and finally it does...!" (Man in Portable Toilet) * "Jews play stupid games. Jews, that's why they're lame!" ([[Eric Cartman]]) * "Let's not forget that for some people, Christmas is about the birth of Jesus." ([[Mr. Hankey]]) * "Oh holy night! The something something something. And is the night with Christmas trees and pie." ([[Eric Cartman]]) * "Merry fuckin' Christmas!" ([[Mr. Garrison]]) * "Un Tannenbaum!" ([[Adolf Hitler]]) * "Courteney Cox, I love you, you're so hot, on that show!" ([[Gerald Broflovski]]) Summary: Please note that all contributions to South Park Wiki may be edited, altered, or removed by other contributors. If you do not want your writing to be edited mercilessly, then do not submit it here. You are also promising us that you wrote this yourself, or copied it from a public domain or similar free resource (see South Park Wiki:Copyrights for details). Do not submit copyrighted work without permission! Cancel Editing help (opens in new window)