Well, I'm No Biologist
South Park
Season 1 E 8 • 11/19/1997

Mephisto shows Chef the rapid rate at which his turkeys' DNA is multiplying. Chef understands and is here to help.

Watching

02:45

Kick the Baby
South ParkS1 E1

Cartman gets probed by aliens.
08/13/1997
03:09

Symbiotic Metamorphosis Device
South ParkS1 E1

Chef sings a song to cheer up the boys.
08/13/1997
02:32

80-Foot Satellite
South ParkS1 E1

A giant satellite emerges from Cartman's ass.
08/13/1997
02:10

Moo Moo Moo
South ParkS1 E1

Aliens think cows are the most intelligent beings on the planet.
08/13/1997
01:45

Serenading Kathie Lee
South ParkS1 E2

Chef sings a song of love, and lust, to Kathie Lee.
08/20/1997
00:45

Kathie Lee is Coming
South ParkS1 E2

The Mayor talks to her aides about Kathie Lee's arrival.
08/20/1997
00:45

Chef's Excited
South ParkS1 E2

Chef tells the boys about his plans for an encounter with Kathie Lee.
08/20/1997
01:01

Follow Your Dreams
South ParkS1 E2

Cartman winds up on Geraldo for being incredibly obese.
08/20/1997
01:57

Scuzzlebutt Saved The Day
South ParkS1 E3

Scuzzlebutt saves the boys from death by lava.
08/27/1997
01:36

Hot Lava
South ParkS1 E3

After the volcano threat has died down, Stan shoots Scuzzlebutt.
08/27/1997
01:37

Totally Screwed
South ParkS1 E3

Stan's Dad shows the mayor a graph of how totally screwed South Park is.
08/27/1997
00:48

Let's Get Those Kids
South ParkS1 E3

The mayor tells the town that the boys are in need of rescue.
08/27/1997
01:25

Duck & Cover
South ParkS1 E3

Officer Barbrady shows an old film to help with volcano safety.
08/27/1997
01:10

Big Gay Al
South ParkS1 E4

A seemingly unwanted Sparky runs away and is found by Big Gay Al, who invites him to live in his gay animal sanctuary.
09/03/1997
01:31

Football Practice
South ParkS1 E4

Chef leads the football team in a practice for the homecoming game. Jimbo and Ned asks Chef if the team will beat the spread.
09/03/1997
00:49

Love the Football
South ParkS1 E4

While explaining the game to the team, Chef ends up singing an erotic song about romancing the football.
09/03/1997
00:36

Game Day
South ParkS1 E4

Game day has arrived but Stan is on a search for Sparky. Chef begins to panic.
09/03/1997
01:09

Finding the Sanctuary
South ParkS1 E4

The game starts with Kyle playing for quarterback. Stan's search leads him to Big Gay Al's Big Gay Animal Sanctuary.
09/03/1997
00:57

A Very Bad Start
South ParkS1 E4

The game begins and it's off to a bad start. Jimbo starts getting threatened when people realize that things are not going according to plan.
09/03/1997
01:33

Big Gay Boat Ride
South ParkS1 E4

Big Gay Al takes Stan on his boat and teaches him about the history of gayness. Stan has a change of heart and accepts Sparky for who he is.
09/03/1997
02:15

A Gay Victory
South ParkS1 E4

Stan returns to the game just in time to beat the spread. When he makes his victory speech, he says being gay os okay.
09/03/1997
01:54

Get 'em to Make Sweet Love
South ParkS1

The only way the boys are going to create a pint-sized elephant for the science fair is to get the animals to make sweet, sweet love.
09/10/1997
01:46

Love Gravy
South ParkS1

Elton John and Chef serenade the elephant and Fluffy into the right mood for makin' love.
09/10/1997
00:50

Chef Won't Touch It
South ParkS1

The boys decide to watch "Terrance and Phillip" at Stan's house because only his grandpa is home. Stan considers killing the old man but Chef won't give him advice.
09/17/1997
01:51

Celebrity Judge: Tina Yothers
South ParkS1

Wendy wins best costume in the costume contest and Stan is awarded worst costume. Meanwhile, zombie Clyde begins his rampage with Bebe.
10/29/1997
01:36

Zombie Attack
South ParkS1

The zombie Morticians go after South Park residents. At lunch, the boys wonder why Kenny won't eat. Then he attacks a student.
10/29/1997
01:06

Incredible Advances in Topical Cream
South ParkS1

Chef tries to tell the doctor that his pinkeye diagnosis was wrong. The doctor disagrees with him and a gang of zombies come in and attack.
10/29/1997
01:23

Make Love Even When I'm Dead
South ParkS1

The boys and Chef arrive at the morgue. Suddenly, the zombies attack and Chef gets bitten.
10/29/1997
00:48

Well, I'm No Biologist
South ParkS1 E8

Mephisto shows Chef the rapid rate at which his turkeys' DNA is multiplying. Chef understands and is here to help.
11/19/1997
02:03

Mutant Turkeys Are Back
South ParkS1 E8

At the food drive, Kenny grabs a can of string beans. The turkeys return and Chef gives orders to the town on how to protect themselves.
11/19/1997
00:59

Pissed Off Turkeys
South ParkS1 E8

During the food drive, the turkeys show up and attack. The mayor finally realizes that the true threat are the turkeys.
11/19/1997
01:10

Braveheart
South ParkS1 E8

Chef gives the town of South Park a motivational speech before leading them into battle against the evil turkeys.
11/19/1997
02:48

Fa La La Your La
South ParkS1

South Park Elementary finally presents the happy, non-offensive, non-denominational school play, with compositions by Phillip Glass.
12/17/1997
01:32

Mr. Hankey Teaches the Town
South ParkS1

Mr. Hankey finally comes to life to tell the people of South Park they focus too hard on what's wrong with Christmas and to remind them what the Holidays are really about.
12/17/1997
02:43

We're All Special
South ParkS1

Damien is shunned by the boys, leading him to demonstrate his demonic powers by turning Kenny into a duck-billed platypus.
02/04/1998
01:57

Satan Chooses Jesus
South ParkS1

Damien destroys the playground with his evil wrath and calls upon his dark father to battle it out with Jesus.
02/04/1998
01:24

Forsaken and Trainin'
South ParkS1

With only one person supporting him, Jesus feels betrayed by the people of South Park, who have all changed their bets in favor of Satan.
02/04/1998
00:47

Birthday Party
South ParkS1

At the party, Chef decides the fight can wait so he can sample some of Ms. Cartman's "Chili."
02/04/1998
01:13

Ants in the Pants
South ParkS1

When Cartman opens Kyle's birthday gift and sees it's not a Red Megaman, he blows his lid and calls off the party.
02/04/1998
01:49

Not Acting Like A Freak
South ParkS1 E11

After Wendy freaks out on Stan, the boys talk to Chef about his date with Ms. Ellen. He tells them that she is a lesbian.
02/11/1998