- ALL RIGHT, COOL, GUYS.GATHER ALL AROUND.

EVERYONE SHOULD BEA WITNESS TO THIS.

ALL RIGHT, YOU READY?

NOW SAY, "I'M A DORK AND IDESERVE WHAT'S COMING TO ME."

COME ON, DUDE.

"I'M A DORK AND I DESERVEWHAT'S COMING TO ME."

- I'M A DORK AND I DESERVEWHAT'S COMING TO ME.

OW!- ALL RIGHT, YOUR TURN, CRAIG.

- FELLAS, MY UNDERWEARIS SO FAR UP MY BUTT CRACK,

MY LEGS ARE NUMB.

- WELL, THAT'S WHAT YOU GET

FOR BEINGA DOUCHE BAG AGAIN, BUTTERS.

YOU GOTTA TAKE YOUR MEDICINE!

- YEAH, I GUESS I DESERVE IT.- HEY, HEY!

WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS

PICKING ON BUTTERS FORTHIS TIME?

- OH, DUDE, YOU GUYS ARE NOTGONNA BELIEVE THIS.

YOU KNOWWHAT WE JUST FOUND OUT?

WELL, IT TURNS OUTTHAT BUTTERS--OUR BUTTERS--

HAS NEVER KISSED A GIRL.

- OOF!

- SO WHAT?

- SO WHAT?!

SO I'M ALMOST NINE YEARS OLD,

AND ANYONE WHO HASN'TKISSED A GIRL BY FOURTH GRADE

IS A DORK.

- THAT'S RIGHT.- OOF!

- [laughs]- YOU GUYS, WE GOT IT!

WE GOT IT!

SALLY DARSONIS SELLING KISSES FOR $5!

- SELLIN' KISSES?

- SHE HANGS OUTBEHIND THE TEMP BUILDING

DURING AFTERNOON RECESS.

SHE'LL KISS ANY BOYTHAT PAYS HER.

- YOU MEAN I'M...GONNA KISS A GIRL TODAY?

- SO THEN WHENSHE STICKS HER TONGUE OUT,

- OH, BOY.I SURE AM NERVOUS.

- NOTHING TO BE NERVOUS ABOUT,BUTTERS.

YOU'RE FINALLYGOING TO BECOME A MAN TODAY.

- BUTTERS, I THINK YOU SHOULDRECONSIDER THIS.

- HOW COME?

- DUDE, YOU DON'T WANTYOUR FIRST KISS

TO BE SOMETHING YOU PAID FOR.

IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE SPECIAL.

- OH, GOD, WHY DON'T YOUGO SIT UNDER A RAINBOW

AND WRITE A POEM, KYLE.

- I GOTTA DO THIS.

I GOTTA KNOWWHAT IT FEELS LIKE.

[dramatic music]

- OH, BOY. OH, JEEZ.

OH, STAY CALM, BUTTERS.

HOW WAS IT?

- PRETTY WORTH IT.

- GO AHEAD, B-BUTTERS.GO--GO GET SOME.

- I'M GOIN'.

OHH.

OH, HI.

- HEY.

- SO, UM, I WAS HOPINGMAYBE I COULD GET A KISS.

- OKAY, COOL.

- YEAH, COOL.

OKAY.

- SO YOU GOT MONEY?

- OH, MONEY, RIGHT.

THERE YOU GO.

A FIVE DOLLAR BILL.ALL FOR YOU.

- ALL RIGHT.YOU READY?

[kissing noise]

- THANK YOU!

- ATTA BOY, BUTTERS!

- YOU DID IT!

- YOU'RE A MAN NOW!- GOOD JOB, BUTTERS!

- [thinking] BOY, OH, BOY.

I FINALLY DID IT.

I'M A MAN NOW.

JEEZ. I'M GONNA START HAVINGLOTS OF RESPONSIBILITIES SOON.

I GOTTA START THINKING ABOUTA CAREER.

THERE'S GONNA BE FAMILY ANDBILLS TO START WORRYIN' ABOUT.

NO MORE PLAYTIME FOR YOU,BUTTERS.

YOU GOTTA BUCKLE DOWNAND FIND--

AND FIND YOURSELFA WAY TO MAKE MONEY.

HEY, I KNOW!

[students chattering]

HEY, FELLERS!

FELLERS, DO YOU LIKEGETTIN' KISSES?

'CAUSE I KNOW A GIRLTHAT'LL GIVE YOU A GREAT KISS

FOR JUST $5!

- [lisping]SHE'LL KISS ANYBODY?

- SURE, SCOTT!EVEN IF YOU GOT DIABETES!

[kissing noise]

- WOW.

IT'S ALMOST LIKEHAVING SOMEONE CARE ABOUT YOU.

- JEEZ, BUTTERS.

THANKS FOR BRINGING ME YETANOTHER CUSTOMER.

HERE'S YOUR $2 CUT AGAIN!

- BOY, OH, BOY!THIS SURE IS GREAT!

I BEEN THINKIN', SALLY.

I COULD PROBABLY DRUM UPSOME THIRD GRADE CUSTOMERS

IF YOU COULD DO KISSESBEFORE SCHOOL, TOO.

WE COULD MAKEDOUBLE THE MONEY!

- OH, THAT'D BE GREAT!

BUT I CAN'T DO KISSESBEFORE SCHOOL.

I HAVE SWIMMING CLASS.

- AW, NUTS.

WELL, I DID HAVEANOTHER IDEA.

WHAT IF WE GOT ANOTHER GIRLTO FILL IN FOR YOU SOMETIMES?

- WHAT?

- WELL, YOU KNOW,WE BRING SOMEONE ON,

SHOW HER WHAT TO DO,

AND THEN SHAREALL OUR MONEY TOGETHER.

- WOW, YOU'RE RIGHT, BUTTERS!

I SHOULD START EXPANDING.

- WE COULD HAVE OUR VERY OWNKISSIN' COMPANY!

THE NEXT KEY TO A SUCCESSFULBUSINESS IS INNOVATION.

I THINK MAYBE WE NEEDTO UNDERSTAND THAT SOME BOYS

SIMPLY CAN'T AFFORDTHE $5 FOR A KISS.

SO WHAT IF WE START ALSOCHARGING JUST $2 FOR A HUG.

- WOW, THAT'S A GREAT IDEA,BUTTERS!

- WELL, THANKS!

SALLY, I THINK YOUR POSITIONBEHIND THE TEMP BUILDING

AT RECESS IS PERFECT.

MEGAN, I'M THINKING ABOUTMOVING YOU

TO THE BASEBALL FIELDAFTER SCHOOL

DURING LITTLE LEAGUE PRACTICE.

- GOT IT.

- I GOT A KISSING BOOTH SET UP

AT THE KID'S FAIR ON SATURDAY,

SO, KAYLA AND ASHLEY,YOU TAKE TURNS THERE.

ANY GIRL THAT SELLS MORETHAN 20 KISSES GETS...

A LITTLE SUNSHINE.

BUT IF YOU DON'T SHOW UPFOR WORK AT ALL,

I'M AFRAID YOU GETA STORMY CLOUD.

- THIS IS GONNA BE GREAT!

- SIR!SIR, TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.

WE'VE GOT RUMORS COMING IN

OF A POSSIBLEPROSTITUTION COMPANY

STARTING UP IN SOUTH PARK.

- WHAT?OHH, NOT IN MY COUNTY!

- WE'VE GOT NO INFORMATIONON THE PROSTITUTES,

DON'T KNOW WHO THEY AREOR WHERE THEY CAME FROM.

- SO THEN WE NEED TOGO AFTER THE JOHNS.

WE NEED TO LET THE MENOF THIS TOWN KNOW

THAT IF THEY PAY FOR SEX,THEY'RE GOING TO JAIL.

- STING OPERATION, SIR?

- WE NEED AN UNDERCOVER COPDISGUISED AS A PROSTITUTE

SO WE CAN ARREST ANY CITIZENSLOOKING FOR CHEAP THRILLS.

[insects chirping]

HEY, BABY,YOU LOOKING FOR A PARTY?

- H-HOW MUCHARE YOU CHARGING?

- 20 FOR ORAL,50 FOR HALF AND HALF.

ANAL WILL COST YOU EXTRA.

- UH, GET IN.

- RIGHT HERE'S GOOD, SEXY.

NOW IF YOU WOULDN'T MIND

HANDING OVER THE $20FOR ORAL SEX.

- O-OKAY.

- ALL RIGHT, BUDDY,

GO AHEADAND UNBUTTON YOUR PANTS.

[zipper opens]

ALL RIGHT, HERE WE GO.

- OHH.

OH, YEAH.

OH, MAN, OH!

OH! AHH! OHHHH!

OH! OH, SORRY I WASSO QUICK.

- OH, THAT'S ALL RIGHT.

NOTHING WRONGWITH IT--FREEZE!

YOU'RE BUSTED, BUDDY!I'M A COP!

- AH! WHAT?

- THIS ISA STING OPERATION, SCUM BAG,

AND YOU ARE GOING TO JAILFOR SOLICITING PROSTITUTION!

GOT OUR FIRST ONE, BOYS.

I'M BRINGING HIM INFOR BOOKING.

THERE'S LIKE FOUR GIRLSAT THE SCHOOL NOW

OFFERING TO KISS BOYSFOR MONEY.

- YEAH, I HEARD THAT NOW

EVEN STACY ANDERSONIS SELLING KISSES!

- STACY ANDERSON?

[muffled]

- HEY, FELLAS!WOULD ANYONE LIKE A COUPON?

WE ARE OFFERING TWO FOR ONEKISSES TODAY THROUGH THURSDAY.

- BUTTERS, YOU'RE THE ONEDOING ALL THIS?

- YEP! I AM FOUNDERAND HEAD CEO

OF THE BUTTERS'KISSING COMPANY!

JUST LOOK AT THIS!

- DAMN, DUDE, YOU MADEALL THAT MONEY OFF OF CHICKS?

- I'M TELLING YOU, GUYS,IT'S THE MOST GENIUS IDEA

I'VE EVER CAME UP WITH!

A LOT OF BOYS WILL PAYTO KISS MY EMPLOYEES!

- YOU DIDN'T THINK OFANYTHING BUTTERS!

GUYS HAVE BEEN DOINGWHAT YOU'RE DOING FOR YEARS!

YOU'RE NOTHINGBUT A COMMON PIMP!

- A PIMP. HUH.

BOY, KYLE WAS RIGHT, SALLY!

THERE'S GUYS WITH KISSINGCOMPANIES ALL OVER THE COUNTRY!

THE PERSON MANAGINGALL THE WOMEN

IS KNOWN AS "THE PIMP,"

WHILE THE WORKING WOMENARE REFERRED TO

AS "HO" OR "BITCH."

OH! YOU'RE A BITCH, SALLY!

- OH!- HEY, LOOK AT THIS!

THERE'S ABOUT TO BE A BIG PIMPCONVENTION IT LOOKS LIKE!

I GOTTA GET TOTHAT CONVENTION, SALLY!

I COULD LEARN ALL KINDSOF STUFF FOR OUR COMPANY!

♪

HI THERE!MY NAME IS BUTTERS.

THIS SURE ISA NICE CONVENTION HUH?

- YEAH, I'M JUSTSTARTING OUT.

I REALLY CAME LAST MINUTE'CAUSE I WAS HOPING

TO LEARN MORE ABOUT BEINGA SUCCESSFUL PIMP.

- YOU? YOU BE PIMPIN'?

- YEAH, JUST ABOUT A WEEK NOW.

I HAVE FOUR GIRLSAT THE MOMENT,

BUT I FEEL LIKE I COULD BEDOING A BETTER JOB.

[laughter,muffled conversation]

- NOW SEE,YOU THINK YOU A PIMP,

BUT YOU CAN'T BE PIMPIN',KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?

YOU WANNA BE A PIMP,THEN YOU GOTTA LEARN THE GAME.

SEE, IT'S ALL ABOUTKNOWING THE GAME.

- WHAT'S THE GAME?

- THE GAME IS HOWYOU TREAT THE BITCHES,

KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?

BITCH GOTTA KNOWWHEN SHE OUT THERE,

SHE MAKIN'YOUR MOTHERFUCKING MONEY,

KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?

YOU GOT YOUR MAIN BITCH,KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?

THAT BE YOUR BOTTOM BITCH.

THAT BITCH RANK HIGHERTHAN ALL THE OTHER BITCHES,

BUT SHE STILL A BITCH,KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?

- YES, I KNOWWHAT YOU ARE SAYING.

YOU DON'T HAVE TOKEEP ASKING.

- SEE, IT'S ALL ABOUTMIND CONTROL.

YOU GOT TO ACT THE PART.

ANY MAN CAN CONTROLA BITCH'S HEART

BUT A PIMP GOTTA CONTROLA BITCH'S MIND,

KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?

- I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING.

- PIMP GOTTA BE OUT THEREEVERY MOTHERFUCKING DAY

KEEPIN' HIS BITCHES IN LINE.

CAN'T LET 'EM GO SHOPPING,

SPENDING THEIR MONEYON STUPID SHIT.

BITCH GOT TO THINK THAT'S

YOUR MOTHERFUCKING MONEY,YOU KNOW WHAT I'M SAYING?

- YEAH! I BELIEVE I KNOWWHAT YOU ARE SAYING!

- THERE YOU ARE, BUTTERS.- HEY, DAD!

- BUTTERS, WE HEARD A RUMOR

THAT YOU MIGHT HAVEA LITTLE GIRLFRIEND.

SALLY DARSON?

- AW, HELL, DAD,I GOT LOTS OF GIRLFRIENDS.

SALLY IS JUSTMY BOTTOM BITCH.

- I'VE GOT TO TELL YOU,

I-I DON'T DOTHIS KIND OF THING VERY OFTEN.

YOU'RE SUREYOU'RE NOT A COP, RIGHT?

- NO WAY!

LET'S JUST GET TO THIS, BABY.

- ALL RIGHT.

- [over radio]SO...YOU ARE AGREEING

TO HAVE SEX WITH MEFOR $100, CORRECT?

- SURE. I HAVETHE MONEY RIGHT HERE.

- REMEMBER,HE'S GOING TO GIVE US

THE CODE WORD TO MOVE IN.

WAIT FORTHE CODE WORD--STRETCH.

- CODE WORD IS "STRETCH,"COPY.

- OH, YEAH.YEAH, GET THOSE PANTS DOWN.

- OH, YOU FEEL GOOD.

- OH, YOU'RE A NASTY LITTLEFUCK, AREN'T YA?

YEAH, LET ME SEETHAT HOT PENIS OF YOURS.

OH, YEAH, NICE.[spits]

YEAH, I'M READYWHEN YOU ARE.

- OH, YES!THAT'S GREAT!

- YEAH, YOU LIKE IT?- OH, I LOVE IT!

- YEAH, YOU'REA DIRTY FUCK.

YEAH, COME ON, HARDER!DEEPER!

- OH, YEAH!OH, YEAH!

- YEAH, TEACH ME A LESSON,DADDY!

TEACH THIS LITTLE WHOREA LESSON!

- YEAH! YEAH!

- YEAH, THAT'S RIGHT!

- OH! AGGH! OHHH!

OH! OH.

OH, MAN, THANK YOU.

THAT WAS GREAT.

- YEAH, YOU REALLYWORKED IT, DADDY.

YOU REALLY GAVE MY LITTLE HOLEQUITE A...STRETCH!

- UH, T-THAT'S IT.MOVE IN!

[siren]

- OH, GOD!IT'S THE POLICE!

- FREEZE!

YOU ARE UNDER ARRESTFOR SOLICITING PROSTITUTION!

BOOK HIM, BOYS!

- PLEASE!PLEASE, DON'T DO THIS!

I HAVE A WIFE AND KIDS!

- A WIFE AND KIDS.

AND YOU'RE OUT HERE TROLLINGTHE STREETS FOR PROSTITUTES.

YOU MAKE ME SICK.

TAKE HIM DOWNTOWN, BOYS.

I'M GOINGBACK ON THE STREET.

- THAT'S IT!RECESS IS OVER, BACK TO CLASS!

all: AW!

- BOY, OH, BOY!REALLY GREAT WORK, BITCHES!

YOU ALL SOLDLOTS O' KISSES TODAY!

EXCEPT FOR YOU, MEGAN.

I'M AFRAID YOU GETA STORMY CLOUD STICKER TODAY.

- SO WAIT.

YOU'RE KEEPINGALL THE MONEY NOW?

- I JUST HOLD ONTO ALL THE MONEY

'CAUSE BITCHESCAN'T BE TRUSTED WITH IT.

WE POOL ALL THE KISSING MONEYTOGETHER, SEE?

BUT IF YOU WANT TOBUY ANYTHING,

YOU JUST TALK TOTHE BOTTOM BITCH,

AND THEN THE BOTTOM BITCHTALKS TO ME.

ALL RIGHT,SEE YOU AFTER SCHOOL,

DO YOU KNOWWHAT I AM SAYING?

- ALL RIGHT, CHILDREN,

I WANT YOU ALL TO COPY DOWNTHESE MATH PROBLEMS

AND SOLVE THEM BEFORE RECESS.

- YO, BEBE.BEBE, YO.

- WHAT?

- BITCH, YOU WANNA MAKESOME MOTHERFUCKING MONEY?

- WHAT?

- BITCH, YOU SHOULD BE DOINGKISSES ON THE PLAYGROUND.

YOU CAN MAKE50 BUCKS A DAY.

BUY ALL THE PURSES AND SHOESYOU'VE EVER WANTED.

I'LL TREAT YOU RIGHT, BITCH.

- SHUT UP!

- OH, ALL RIGHT THEN.

HEY, WENDY.

WENDY!

BITCH, DON'T YOU WANNA STARTMAKING SOME REAL FUCKING MONEY?

- LEAVE ME ALONE.

- WELL, YOU WERE MADEFOR THE PLAYGROUND, BITCH.

YOU SHOULD BEOUT THERE WORKING.

DON'T YOU WANNA NEW LUNCHBOX?NICE NEW COAT?

I CAN GETALL THAT FOR YOU, BITCH.

- BUTTERS, DUDE!- WHAT?

- YOU CAN'TCALL MY GIRLFRIEND A BITCH!

- OH. ALL I'M SAYIN',

THE BITCH SHOULD BEOUT THERE WORKING IS ALL.

WHATCHA DOING, BITCH, JUSTGIVIN' KISSES TO STAN FOR FREE?

YOU SHOULD BE MAKINGSOME MOTHERFUCKING MONEY.

- STAN!

- BUTTERS, SERIOUSLY,IF YOU DON'T STOP THIS,

I'LL KICK YOUR ASS!

- CLYDE, HERE'S 100 BUCKS.

IF STAN COMES NEAR ME,PUNCH HIM.

- WOW-WEE!

- DUDE, WE'VE CREATEDA MONSTER.

- COME ON, WENDY,

YOU SHOULD BE PUTTIN'THAT MOUTH TO WORK.

- BUTTERS! BUTTERS,DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM?

- ALL THESE BITCHESARE KISSIN' FELLERS,

AND THEY HAVEN'T FIGURED OUT

THAT THEY CAN BE MAKIN'SOME SERIOUS FUCKING MONEY.

NOW REMEMBER,YOU'RE CHARGING $5 FOR A KISS,

2 FOR A HUG,AND 6 FOR HALF AND HALF.

ALL RIGHT, BITCH?

ALL RIGHT,HOW ABOUT A FREEBIE?

OH, WHOOPIE!

- BUTTERS, I REALLY THINKWE SHOULD TALK.

- SURE, KYLE.

- BUTTERS, CAN'T YOU SEETHIS IS WRONG?

YOU'VE GOT LITTLE BOYSALL OVER SCHOOL

SPENDING ALL THEIR LUNCH MONEYON KISSES.

BOYS SHOULDN'T BE PAYINGFOR KISSES.

IT'S WRONG.

- KYLE, EVERY BOY PAYSFOR KISSES.

DO YOU KNOW WHAT I AM SAYING?

IF YOU GOT A GIRLAND SHE KISSES YOU,

SOONER OR LATERYOU'RE PAYING FOR IT.

YOU GOTTA TAKE HEROUT TO LUNCH,

TAKE HER TO A MOVIE,AND THEN SPEND TIME

LISTENING TOALL HER STUPID PROBLEMS.

LOOK. LOOK AT STANRIGHT THERE.

HE'S GOTTA SIT THEREAND LISTEN

TO HER STUPID MOTHERFUCKINGPROBLEMS 'CAUSE SHE KISSES HIM.

YOU ASK ME, THAT'S A LOT MORETHAN THE $5 MY COMPANY CHARGES.

- BUTTERS,WHAT'S HAPPENED TO YOU?

- WHAT HAPPENEDIS I BECAME A MAN.

I'M SORRY I'M NOTYOUR LITTLE BUDDY ANYMORE,

BUT THERE'S A TIMEPEOPLE HAVE TO GROW UP!

DO YOU KNOW WHAT I AM SAYING?

- ALPHA TAO OMEGA, WOO!

- A.T.O.s!

- ALRIGHT, A.T.O.s,

OUR LITTLE KEVINIS 21 TODAY!

- WHOO!- YEAH, KEVIN!

- AND SO, KEVIN,

WE WOULD LIKE TO WELCOME YOUTO MANHOOD.

OUR GIFT TO YOU.

[Peaches' Fuck The Pain Away]

- WHOO!

♪

♪ SUCKIN' ON MY TITTIES

- EW!

- ♪ LIKE YOU WANTED ME,CALLING ME ALL THE TIME ♪

♪ LIKE BLONDIECHECK OUT MY CHRISSIE BEHIND ♪

♪ IT'S FINEALL OF THE TIME ♪

♪ LIKE SEX ON THE BEACHES

♪ WHAT ELSE IS INTHE TEACHES OF PEACHES? ♪

♪ HUH, WHAT

[men moaning]

- GIVE IT TO ME!

COME ON, YOU SISSIES,I CAN FIT MORE OF YOU!

[moaning continues]

YEAH, YOU LIKEYOUR LITTLE STRIPPER WHORE?

YOU LIKE HER?

[moaning fades]

[gun cocks]FREEZE!

[siren beeps,chatter on police radio]

TAKE THEMALL TO THE STATION

FOR ORAL AND ANAL SEXWITH A PROSTITUTE!

HALF OF THEM DIDN'T EVEN USEA CONDOM!

DON'T YOU STUPID KIDS KNOWTHE DISEASES YOU CAN CATCH?

HAND ME THAT EVIDENCE BAG!

[flatulence]

- SIR, SOME OF USARE WONDERING

IF MAYBE YOU'RE NOT...TAKING THIS ROLE A BIT FAR.

- WHAT? NO WAY.

NOTHING IS MORE IMPORTANTTHAN KEEPING PROSTITUTION

OUT OF OUR COMMUNITY.

[cell phone rings]OH, HOLD ON, THAT'S MY DADDY.

HEY, DADDY.

- WHERE YOU AT, BITCH?

I NEED MY BOTTOM BITCHRIGHT NOW.

- Y-YES, DADDY,I'M ON MY WAY.

- I MADE YOU MY BOTTOM BITCH,

NOW YOU GOTTA TAKE CAREOF YOUR PIMP,

KNOW WHAT I'M SAYIN'?

- BE RIGHT THERE.

SORRY, GUYS.MY DADDY NEEDS ME RIGHT NOW.

- DAMN, BITCH!

YOUR PIMPBEAT YOUR ASS AGAIN?

- HE'S AN ASSHOLE.

- YOU KNOW, I HEARD A RUMORABOUT SOME NEW PIMP

UP IN PARK COUNTY.

THEY SAYHE'S REAL RESPECTFUL.

LOTS A GIRLSSWITCHIN' OVER TO HIM.

- A PIMP THAT RESPECTSHIS HOS?

SIGN MY ASS UP.

- AND THAT'S $3,000 TODAYFOR CHARISE.

- DID I DO GOOD, DADDY?

- REALLY GREAT WORK, BITCH.

THAT IS ANOTHERSUNSHINE STICKER FOR YOU.

- THANK YOU, DADDY!

- AND SO, I WOULD LIKE TO SEE

IF THERE ARE ANYHOUSING LOAN OPPORTUNITIES

FOR SOME OF MY EMPLOYEES,

AND ALSO WHAT KINDOF CORPORATE TAX

I SHOULD BE FILING UNDER.

- AND EXACTLY WHAT KIND OFBUSINESS ARE YOU RUNNING?

- IT'S A KISSIN' COMPANY!

- AND YOU'RE MAKING A PROFIT?

- OH, SURE!

MY BLACK EMPLOYEE,CHARISE OVER THERE,

ONE TIME, SHE MADE $2,000ON ONE CUSTOMER!

CAN YOU BELIEVE IT?

$2,000 JUST TO KISS A FELLER.

SHE CURRENTLY STAYSIN A MOTEL ROOM

'CAUSE A LOT OF HER CUSTOMERSSEE HER LATE.

YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVETHE TIME OF NIGHT

SOME FELLERS WANT A KISS.

- DO YOU KEEP ANY RECORD

OF THE MEN GETTINGTHESE KISSES?

- COURSE!

MY BOTTOM BITCH KEEPSA DATABASE OF ALL OUR CUSTOMERS.

SPECIALLY THE VIPs,LIKE SENATOR MORRIS.

- SENATOR MORRIS?

- SURE!

SENATOR MORRIS GETS KISSESEVERY DAY AT LUNCH TIME.

YOU KNOW WHERE HE LIKES TOGET KISSED?

- WHERE?

- IN A MOTEL ROOM.

DARNDEST THING.HE MUST GET SLEEPY.

- ALL RIGHT,GET OUT OF HERE!

- HUH? WHY?- I'M NOT FALLING FOR IT!

- BUT I HEARD ACORN HELPSPIMPS AND THEIR BITCHES.

- WE AREN'T GIVING YOU ANYTHING.GET OUT!

- MRS. DAVIS, IS THERESOME KIND OF PROBLEM?

- NO, SIR.

- HEY! MR. DANIELS!

YOU GET KISSESFROM MY BITCH ROXIE

IN THE ALLEY BEHIND SIZZLER!

BOY! HOW DO YOU LIKETHAT, BITCHES?

APPROVAL FOR TWO HOUSING LOANSAND TAX EXEMPT STATUS.

FILE THESE AWAY, SALLY!- OKAY!

GALS, COULD YOU ALLCOME GATHER 'ROUND?

GATHER ROUND, GALS.TAKE A KNEE.

GALS, I--WELL, I'M AFRAIDI CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE.

I'M GONNA BE LEAVINGTHE COMPANY.

I ENJOYED BEINGYOUR PIMP AND ALL.

IT'S JUST THAT...WHEN I SEE REAL LOVE,

LIKE WHAT THOSETWO PEOPLE HAVE, WELL...

WELL, IT JUST MAKES MEFEEL LIKE A...

WELL, LIKE A DICK.

I MAY BE A MAN NOW,

BUT IT DOESN'T MEANI HAVE THE RIGHT

TO BE EARNING MONEYFOR WHAT GIRLS DO.

WHETHER YOU CHARGE FELLERSFOR KISSES BY CASH,

OR BY MAKING THEM LISTEN

TO YOUR STUPIDMOTHERFUCKING PROBLEMS,

WELL, THAT'S YOUR HARD WORK.

BITCHES, THIS IS YOUR COMPANY NOW,

SO GET OUT THERE

AND MAKE YOURSELFSOME MOTHERFUCKING MONEY!

[peaceful music]

♪

- HAPPY ANNIVERSARY, BABY.DO YOU LIKE 'EM?

- I LOVE 'EM, DARLING.

- I WANTED TO GET YOUSOMETHING EXTRA SPECIAL.

- WELL, HOLD ON.

I'VE GOT SOMETHINGFOR YOU TOO, MY LOVE.

I JUST PUT IT RIGHT OVER HEREBY THE--FREEZE!

HA! YOU'RE BUSTED, BUDDY.I'M A COP!

FILE THESE AWAY, SALLY!- OKAY!

- UH-UH! DADDY, HOW COMETHIS HO GET TO BE BOTTOM BITCH?

- WHAT?

- I MAKE THE MOST MONEYFOR YOU, DADDY.

THAT MEANS IF ANYONE SHOULD BEBOTTOM BITCH, IT'S ME.

- HEY, SCREW OFF, HO!

- FAIR IS FAIR, HO!

- WHOA, WHOA!BITCHES, BITCHES!

- EXCUSE ME!

WELL, WELL, WELL.

THIS MUST BETHE ORGANIZATION

I'VE BEEN HEARINGSO MUCH ABOUT.

IT TOOK ME A LONG TIMETO FIND YOU.

YOU WON'T BELIEVE THE HARDSHIPSI'VE BEEN THROUGH

TRYING TO TRACK YOU DOWN.

MY NAME IS YOLANDA.

I'D LIKE TO KNOW ALL ABOUTYOUR OPERATION HERE.

YOU SEE, I JUST LEFTMY PIMP RECENTLY

AND I'M LOOKINGFOR A NEW ONE.

- OH!

WELL, WE OPERATEON A 60/40 SPLIT HERE.

BITCHES HAVE ACCESSTO MEDICARE

AND NOW LOW-INCOMEHOUSING LOANS.

- WELL, I THINK THAT'S ABOUTALL I NEED TO HEAR.

- YOLANDA![horn honking]

YOLANDAAA!

- WHAT'S THAT?

- YOLANDA, PLEASE!

YOU GOTTA COME BACK TO ME!

I GOT NOTHIN' WITHOUT YOU!

- YOU'VE GOT A LOT OF NERVECOMING HERE, KESHAWN.

AFTER THE WAY YOU TREATED ME!

I NEED A PIMPTHAT DOESN'T BEAT ME

EVERY TIME HE GETS DRUNK!

- YOLANDA, I LOVE YOU!

I NEED YOU.

NOT AS MY BOTTOM BITCH.

I WANT...

I WANT TO MARRY YOU.

- IT'S TOO LATEFOR THAT, KESHAWN.

I JUST TOLD THIS PIMPI WAS HIS BITCH NOW.

- WELL, HOLD ON NOW.

I'D NEVER GET IN THE WAYOF SOMEBODY BEING HAPPY.

US PIMPS GOTTA BE GOOD,EVEN TO EACH OTHER.

- [sobbing]THANKS, PIMP.

YOU DONE CHANGED THE GAME,THAT'S WHAT YOU DID.

MARRY ME, YOLANDA.

WE'LL MOVE TO A LITTLE CHATEAUIN SWITZERLAND,

GET AWAY FROM ALL THIS.

- OH, KESHAWN!

[sweeping romantic music]

- AWW!

♪

- I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.

- BABE, I LOVE YOU TOO.- SO MUCH, BABY.

- LET'S--LET'S BE HAPPY, OKAY?

- PROMISE, BABE, PROMISE.

- [sniffling]OH. OH.

OH, JEEZ.

GALS?

GALS, COULD YOU ALLCOME GATHER 'ROUND?

GATHER ROUND, GALS.TAKE A KNEE.

GALS, I--WELL, I'M AFRAIDI CAN'T DO THIS ANYMORE.

I'M GONNA BE LEAVINGTHE COMPANY.

I ENJOYED BEINGYOUR PIMP AND ALL.

IT'S JUST THAT...WHEN I SEE REAL LOVE,

LIKE WHAT THOSETWO PEOPLE HAVE, WELL...

WELL, IT JUST MAKES MEFEEL LIKE A...

WELL, LIKE A DICK.

I MAY BE A MAN NOW,

BUT IT DOESN'T MEANI HAVE THE RIGHT

TO BE EARNING MONEYFOR WHAT GIRLS DO.

WHETHER YOU CHARGE FELLERSFOR KISSES BY CASH,