MY GOD DAMN BROTHER IS TRYINGTO FOLLOW ME TO SCHOOL AGAIN !
SUCK MY BALLS.
NO, IKE, YOU CAN'T COMETO SCHOOL WITH ME !
YEAH, GO HOME,YOU LITTLE DILDO !
DUDE, FOR THE LAST TIME,DON'T CALL MY BROTHER A DILDO !
ALRIGHT, GO HOME YOU LITTLESEMEN-PUKING, ASSHOLE DICKHEAD.
OW !
DUDE, SWEET !
YEAH, CHECK IT OUT.
READY, IKE ?KICK THE BABY !
DON'T KICKTHE GOD DAMN BABY.
WAH-- AH !
WOAH, CARTMAN,
LOOKS LIKE YOU DIDN'TGET MUCH SLEEP LAST NIGHT.
THAT'S BECAUSEI WAS HAVING THESE
BOGUS NIGHTMARESALL NIGHT LONG.
REALLY ?WHAT ABOUT ?
WELL, I DREAMT THAT I WASLYING IN MY BED, IN THE DARK...
WHEN ALL OF A SUDDEN THIS BRIGHTBLUE LIGHT FILLED THE ROOM.
AND SLOWLY, MY BEDROOM DOORBEGAN TO OPEN.
AND THEN THE NEXT THINGI REMEMBER
I WAS BEING DRUGTHROUGH A HALLWAY !
WEEEE !
THEN THESE SCARY ALIENSWANTED TO OPERATE ON ME !
THEY HAD BIG HEADSAND BIG BLACK EYES--
DUDE, VISITORS !TOTALLY !
WHAT ?
THAT WASN'T A DREAM, CARTMAN,THOSE WERE VISITORS !
NO, IT WAS JUST A DREAM,MY MOM SAID SO.
VISITORS ARE REAL !THEY--
WAIT A MINUTE, THIS HASALL HAPPENED BEFORE.
YEAH. THIS DOES SEEMREALLY FAMILIAR.
WHAT THE FUNK AND WAGNALLSARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ?
CARTMAN, DON'T YOU REMEMBER THELAST TIME YOU HAD THIS DREAM ?
SHUT UP YOU GUYS, YOU'RE JUSTTRYING TO SCARE ME.
NO, DUDE,THIS HAPPENED BEFORE !
ALIENS PUT SOME DEVICE IN YOU,
AND THEN WE TIED YOU TO A TREEAND YOU WENT UP ON THEIR SHIP.
YOU DON'T REMEMBER THAT ?
NO, I DON'TREMEMBER THAT !
YOU DON'T ?
NO, BECAUSE THE ALIENSERASED MY MEMORY !
I REMEMBER THIS WHOLE THING.
IKE TRIED TO FOLLOW YOUTO SCHOOL, YOU KICKED HIM,
THEN CARTMAN TOLD USABOUT HIS ALIEN DREAM.
YEAH, AND THEN CHEFPULLED UP IN HIS CAR.
HELLO THERE, CHILDREN !
AND THEN YOU SAID--
WHAT'S GONNA BE FORLUNCH TODAY, CHEF ?
WELL, TODAY IT'S SALISBURY STEAKWITH HOT BUTTERED NOODLES
( all )AND A CHOICE OFGREEN BEAN SALAD
OR VEGETABLE MEDLEY.
WEIRD.
SAY, DID ANY OF YOUCHILDREN--
SEE THE ALIEN SPACESHIPLAST NIGHT ?
WHAT THE-- ?
CHEF, WE'REIN A REPEAT !
A REPEAT ?
CARTMAN WAS VISITED BYALIENS AGAIN LAST NIGHT.
AND NOW IT'S LIKE WE'RE LIVINGA REPEAT OF A PREVIOUS DAY.
OH, DUDE, I HATE REPEATS.
I'VE BEEN FEELING DEJA VUALL MORNING, CHILDREN.
I KNEW SOMETHING STRANGEWAS GOING ON.
IT ALL STARTED WHEN CARTMANGOT AN ANAL PROBE.
WE HAVE TO GET ERIC TO APROCTOLOGIST RIGHT AWAY.
THE ALIENS TOOK THE CHILDRENUP ON THEIR SHIP !
OH, NO !
DID YOU FIND OUT WHATTHE ALIENS ARE UP TO ?
WHEN I REVERSED THE POLARITIESI FOUND THIS--
IT'S A MESSAGE THATTHE ALIENS ARE BROADCASTING
THROUGHOUT THEENTIRE UNIVERSE.
BUT I HAVE NO IDEAWHAT IT SAYS.
THEY TOOK THE CHILDREN, JEFF !
I HAVE TO KNOW WHATTHOSE ALIENS ARE UP TO !
WAIT A MINUTE--BUTT SEX.
BUTT SEX ?
BUTT SEX REQUIRES A LOT OFLUBRICATION, RIGHT ?
LUBRICATION...LUBRA, CHUPA...
CHUPACABRAS, THE GOATKILLER OF MEXICAN FOLKLORE.
FOLKLORE IS STORIESFROM THE PAST
THAT ARE OFTENFICTIONALIZED,
FICTIONALIZED TO HEIGHTENDRAMA, DRAMA STUDENT !
STUDENTS AT COLLEGESUSUALLY HAVE BICYCLES.
BI, BI-BINARY !IT'S BINARY CODE !
WHO'S HAVING BUTT SEX ?
♪ HELLO MY HONEYHELLO MY BABY ♪
♪ HELLO MYRAG TIME GAL ♪
NO !
♪ LET ME SEARCH ITGONNA WORK IT... ♪
NO !
♪ DON'T PISS ONTHE MOON, BABE ♪
NO !
ALRIGHT, EARTHLINGS, WHAT FORMDO YOU WANT ME TO TAKE ?
HOW ABOUT A TACO--THAT CRAPS ICE CREAM ?
GUYS ?
I LIKE IT.
ME TOO.
ALRIGHT, THEN WE CANGET BACK TO BUSINESS.
FOLLOW ME THIS WAY,EARTHLINGS.
I WANT TO APOLOGIZETO YOU BOYS
FOR ALL THE SPOOKY,SCARY STUFF.
WE JUST NEEDED TO GET TO THEMALFUNCTIONING UPLINK RELAY.
YOU MEAN THE THINGIN CARTMAN'S ASS ?
THAT'S RIGHT.
SEE, THERE ARE DISHES IN OVER50,000 EARTHLINGS' RECTUMS,
YOUR FRIEND'SHAS BEEN MALFUNCTIONING.
WHY DO YOU PUT THEMINTO PEOPLE'S ASSES ?
ARE YOU PLANNING SOMEKIND OF ALIEN TAKE OVER ?
OH, HEAVEN'S NO !
WE'RE A PRODUCTION COMPANY.
WE MAKE INTERGALACTICTELEVISION PROGRAMS
THAT THE WHOLEUNIVERSE WATCHES.
TELEVISION ?
WE AT NERZOD PRODUCTIONSSTARTED 20 BILLION YEARS AGO
WITH ONE PHILOSOPHY:
THE BEST UNIVERSAL TELEVISIONISN'T SCRIPTED, IT'S REAL !
WE STARTED WITHGREAT SHOWS LIKE
"WHO WANTS TOMARRY A GELGAMEK ?"
AND "ANTARES 6MILLIONAIRE".
AND THEN WE HADA BIG HIT WITH
"GET ME OUTTA HERE,I'M A KLIGNANIAN".
BUT THEN, OF COURSE,THERE'S OUR SIGNATURE SHOW,
THE GREATEST UNIVERSALREALITY SHOW OF ALL TIME.
EARTH ?
A FEW BILLION YEARS AGOWE REALIZED--
WHAT IF WE TOOK SPECIESFROM ALL DIFFERENT PLANETSIN THE UNIVERSE
AND PUT THEM TOGETHERON THE SAME PLANET ?
GREAT TV, RIGHT ?
ASIANS, BEARS, DUCKS,JEWS, DEER AND HISPANICS
ALL TRYING TO LIVESIDE BY SIDE ON ONE PLANET !
IT'S GREAT !
OUR PLANET IS JUSTA REALITY TV SHOW ?
WELL, YOU DON'T THINKTHE WHOLE UNIVERSE
WORKS THE WAY EARTHDOES, DO YOU ?
NO ! ONE SPECIES,ONE PLANET.
THERE'S A PLANET OF DEER,A PLANET OF ASIANS AND SO ON.
WE PUT THEM ALL TOGETHERON EARTH
AND THE WHOLE UNIVERSETUNES IN TO WATCH THE FUN !
YOU MEAN THAT YOU ALIENSACTUALLY ENJOY SITTING AROUND
AND WATCHING US FIGHTAND KILL WITH EACH OTHER ?
DUDE, THAT'S MESSED UP.
WHY ?
WHY ! BECAUSE YOU'RE PLAYINGWITH PEOPLE'S LIVES !
YOU'RE TURNING PEOPLE'S PROBLEMSINTO ENTERTAINMENT !
YEAH, WE'D NEVERDO THAT ON EARTH !
THEIR SHIP IS MASSIVE,THERE'S NO WAY TO STOP IT !
WAIT A MINUTE--JACKETS !
OH, NO.
IF PEOPLE DON'T WEAR JACKETSTHEY COULD GET COLD !
A COLD IS CAUSED BY A VIRUS,A VIRUS, A COMPUTER VIRUS !
WE COULD MAKEA COMPUTER VIRUS
AND SEND IT TO THEIR SHIPTO DISABLE THEIR COMPUTERS !
THAT DOESN'T MAKEANY GODDAMN SENSE !
OH YEAH, HOOKER,OH YEAH !
YEAH, WOO, YEAH !
BOY, EARTHLINGS, IS THISA PARTY OR WHAT ?
THAT'S IT, BABY, YOU'REGETTING MY JAGGON HARD !
YEAH, LET'S PARTY !
YEAH, SUCK MY JAGGON !
YEAH, NOW YOUSUCK ON MY JAGGON.
OH, YEAH !
STICK YOUR FINGERIN MY THRUSHER !
OH YEAH, SUCK IT,SUCK THAT JAGGON !
DUDE, I HAVE NO IDEA WHATWE'RE SEEING RIGHT NOW,
BUT I HAVE A FEELINGIT'S REALLY, REALLY WRONG.
OH YEAH !OH YEAH, YEAH !
OH, GOD...MY HEAD.
WHAT DID WE DO ?
OH, MAN, I CAN'T BELIEVEI SUCKED YOUR JAGGON.
OH GOD, WE DID SUCKEACH OTHER'S JAGGONS !
YOU KIDS WON'T TELL ANYBODYABOUT THIS, RIGHT ?
NO.
NO, WAIT--WE WON'T TELL ANYBODY
IF YOU DON'TCANCEL OUR SHOW.
OOH, I KNEWTHAT WAS COMING.
THEY'VE REALLY GOT USBY THE NEZMINS.
THE EARTH SHOWCAN STILL BE GOOD.
JUST ERASE EVERYONE'S MEMORYSO WE DON'T KNOW WE'RE A SHOW !
I'M SURE YOU'LL SEE THAT IFYOU GIVE OUR WORLD TIME
IT WILL BECOME EVEN MOREOUTRAGEOUS AND VIOLENT.
THERE'S EVEN WORLD WAR IIITO LOOK FORWARD TO !
AND THEN WE WON'T HAVE TOSHOW ANYBODY THE PICTURE
KENNY HAS OF YOU GUYS SUCKINGEACH OTHER'S JAGGONS.
ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT,EARTHLINGS !
YOU WIN.
THE SHOW CAN STAY ON.
ALRIGHT !ALRIGHT !
JUST BE SURE TO KEEP UPTHE WARS AND VIOLENCE.
WELL, WE'VE GOT A 5:00WITH THE YERKA PRODUCERS.
NICE MEETING YOU,EARTHLINGS.
BYE !
HE'S A DOCTOR THAT SPECIALIZESIN YOUR ASSHOLE, CHILDREN.
YOU MEAN AT SOME POINTIN THIS DOCTOR'S LIFE
HE DECIDED HE WANTED TOWORK ON PEOPLE'S BUTTHOLES ?
THAT'S RIGHT.
WHAT A DICK.
HELLO, EVERYONE.
HELLO, DOCTOR.
THANKS FOR SEEING ERICON SUCH SHORT NOTICE.
WHAT SEEMS TO BETHE PROBLEM ?
WE JUST WANT YOUTO TAKE A LOOK
AND TELL US IF YOU SEEANYTHING ABNORMAL.
OTHER THAN ITSMONSTROUS SIZE.
SHUT UP ! SHUT YOURGOD DAMN MOUTH !!
ALRIGHT, LET'S SEE HERE...
OH MY GOD !
WHAT ?
WHY THERE'S A HUGE CRACK GOINGRIGHT DOWN THE MIDDLE !
HA, HA, VERY FUNNY.
LIKE WE HAVEN'T HEARDTHAT ONE A ZILLION TIMES.
ALRIGHT,LET'S TAKE A LOOK.
HEY !
JUST WHAT THE HELL DO YOUTHINK YOU'RE DOING ?
ERIC, THE DOCTOR HAS TO FEELINSIDE YOUR RECTUM.
AND AFTERWARDS,
HE'LL PROBABLY HAVE TOBURN HIS HAND AND BURY IT.
KYLE, I SWEAR IF I DIDN'THAVE A GUY'S HAND UPMY ASS RIGHT NOW,
I'D LEAP ACROSS THE ROOMAND KICK YOU IN THE NUTS.
EGH, EH-- OOH.
THE PROSTATESEEMS TO BE NORMAL...
NO SWELLING OFTHE HERMODAL GLAND...
WAIT, WHAT'S THIS ?
AAAGH !
ARE YOU OKAY ?
DUDE...
YOU KNOW THAT FEELINGWHEN YOU TAKE A HUGE DUMP ?
AWESOME.
WELL, DOCTOR ?
I'VE NEVER QUITESEEN THIS BEFORE.
PERHAPS HE JUST NEEDSSOME HEMORRHOID CREAM.
AAAGH !
YOU ALRIGHT ?
YOU KNOW THAT FEELING WHENTHE HUGE DUMP YOU JUST TOOK
SHOOTS BACK UP INSIDE YOUR ASS?
NO, I'M NOT ALRIGHT !!
I'VE NEVER SEENA HEMORRHOIDREACT THIS WAY.
THAT WASN'T NO HEMORRHOID,IT WAS A ALIEN HOOP-A-JOO !
COME ON, CHILDREN, WE'VE GOT TOGET ERIC TO SOME REAL HELP !
WHERE TO NOW, CHEF ?
THAT THING INSIDEERIC'S ASSHOLE
LOOKED LIKE SOME KIND OFALIEN SATELLITE DISH.
WE NEED TO SEE MY FRIEND DOWNAT THE SPACE CENTER, NOW !
WHO MIGHT BE ABLETO HELP US, JEFF.
HOW DO WE, UH,MAKE IT COME OUT ?
SOMEONE JUST HAS TO ACTIVATE ITLIKE THE PROCTOLOGIST DID.
OH, NO, NO, NO, NO !
NOBODY IS PUTTING THEIRFINGER IN MY ASS AGAIN !
UNLESS IT'S KYLE.
WHAT ?NO WAY !
YOU DO IT, KENNY.
NOPE, IT HAS TOBE KYLE.
GO ON.
I'M NOT PUTTING MY FINGERUP CARTMAN'S BUTT !
KYLE, THE FATE OF THE WORLDMAY BE AT STAKE.
COME, KYLE,DO HURRY.
GO AHEAD,IT WON'T BITE.
( farts )
GOD DAMN IT, CARTMAN !
I COULDN'T RESIST,I'M SORRY.
( farts )
STOP IT, CARTMAN !
OKAY, OKAY.
( farts )
GOD DAMMIT !
MAN, THAT WAS GREAT.
OKAY, GO AHEAD,I'M ALL OUT OF FARTS NOW.
( farts )
DURRRR !
OKAY, OKAY,IT'S NOT FUNNY ANYMORE.
( farts )
OH, YES IT IS !
ERIC, THAT'S ENOUGH !
OKAY, OKAY.
( farts )
OH, DOUBLE PSYCHE !
THAT'S IT !
I DON'T CARE ABOUTTHE FATE OF THE WORLD.
SCREW IT !
OH, NICE GOING,CARTMAN !
ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT,I'M SORRY.
GO AHEAD, KYLE.
NO !
NO, GO AHEAD,I'M DRY.
YOU'RE LYING !
IT STOPPED BEING FUNNY40 SECONDS AGO, BOYS.
LET'S JUST GET THISOVER WITH.
BUT IT WAS ONE OF THEBEST TIMES I'VE EVER HAD.
CAN I SEE THIS THING,PLEASE ?
OKAY.
( farts )
OKAY, NOW IT'SFUNNY AGAIN.
THIS IS SO AWESOME !
I DON'T THINK I MADE IT
OUT OF THAT PROCTOLOGIST'S'SOFFICE, GUYS,
I THINK I DIEDAND WENT TO HEAVEN !
THAT DOES IT !
CHARRRGE !
( fart )
AAGH !
WHAT'S IT DOING ?
IT'S SENDING A TRANSMISSIONOF SOME KIND.
GOT IT.
IT'S JUST SENDING IMAGES OFCITIES AND PEOPLE AND STUFF.
WHERE IS THE SIGNALBEING SENT TO ?
UGH, AGH !
I DON'T WANNA PLAYANYMORE, YOU GUYS.
WE WENT THROUGH ALL THAT JUSTFOR SOME GAY VIDEO OF EARTH ?
WE WANTED TO SEE AN ALIENPLANET OR SOMETHING !
WHOEVER THEY ARE, IF THEY'RERECEIVING MESSAGES
THEY MIGHT BESENDING THEM TOO.
WAIT A MINUTE.C-CANDY BARS !
CANDY BARS ?
Y'KNOW, CANDY BARS, THEYUSUALLY COME IN A WRAPPER,
JUST LIKE YOU WRAPA CHRISTMAS PRESENT.
CHRISTMAS HAPPENSWHEN IT'S COLD.
COLD AS IN ALASKA.
THAT'S POLAR BEARS,POLAR BEARS...
POLARITY !
I CAN SWITCH THE POLARITYTO SEE WHAT TRANSMISSIONS
ARE COMING FROM THE LOCATIONTHIS ONE IS BEING SENT TO !
THEY'RE COMING IN !
WHAT DO WE DO ?
IT'S THAT GUY YOU WANT !
HE'S TRYING TO REVERSEYOUR POLARITIES !
WHAT ?
RUN !
GET IN THE CAR, CHILDREN,GET IN THE CAR !
( honking )
WHAT IS THAT ?
CAN YOU SEE ANYTHING,CHILDREN ?
THE ALIENSARE CHASING US !
GOD DAMN ALIENS !
CHEF, END OF THE ROAD !
HOLD ON, CHILDREN !WE HAVE TO DITCH THEM !
WHAT ARE YOU DOING, MAN ?
( "Dukes" narrator )LOOKS LIKE THEM BOYS AREGETTING A LITTLE FRESH AIR.
( country music )
I THINK WE DITCHED 'EM.
I DON'T THINK WE'REOUT OF THE WOODS YET.
COOP COOP !
IT'S THE POLICE !
THAT AIN'T NO POLICE !
WHEN DO WE GET TO EAT ?I'M HUNGRY.
CHEF !
OHH !
( "General Lee" horn )
HA ! GOD DAMN ALIENS !
I BEAT YOU !
WHERE'D YOU LEARNTO DRIVE, ALIENS ?
CHINESE AUTO SCHOOL ?
CHEF !CHEF, HELP !
YOU'RE LUCKY I DIDN'TJUST TURN AROUND
AND BEAT YOUR WHITESKINNY ALIEN ASSES ANYWAY !
MAYBE NEXT TIMEYOU'LL REMEMBER TO-- HUH ?
AW, CRAP !
CHILDREN !
( all )CHEFFFF !
WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE THE BOYSARE IN MORE TROUBLE
THAN A JUNE BUGIN MOLASSES.
AND IT'S PRETTY THICKMOLASSES, TOO.
UH...
YOU GUYS,WAKE UP !
WHAT THE--WHERE ARE WE ?
WE'RE IN THEALIEN SHIP.
AH, AH !
UGH, I'M TRAPPED INSIDEHELEN HUNT'S ASS !
OH GOD, HELP ME,YOU GUYS !
IT'S NOTHELEN HUNT'S ASS !
IT'S AN ALIEN SPACESHIP.
OH, THANK GOD !OH THANK, THANK YOU LORD.
YOU GUYS, LOOK.
WOW.WOW.
MY GOD,DO YOU GUYS REALIZE ?
THIS IS ONLY THE SECOND TIMEWE'VE EVER BEEN IN OUTER SPACE.
YEAH.
AWESOME.
THIS IS LIKEMY FIFTH TIME.
UH-OH.
THIS MUST BETHE HEAD ALIEN GUY.
OH, NO !
HELLO, BOYS.
DAD ?
NO, NOT REALLY.
I JUST READ YOUR MINDAND THOUGHT THIS FORM
MIGHT BE MOREPLEASING TO YOU.
OH DUDE, DON'T DO THAT,THAT'S GAY.
YEAH, THAT'S LIKE THATSTUPID MOVIE "CONTACT".
OH GOD, THAT MOVIEPISSED ME OFF.
VERY WELL, I SHALLSHOW MY TRUE FORM--
BLARGH, BLARGH,BLARGH !
OKAY, OKAY, TAKE THE FORMOF SOMETHING ELSE !
HOW'S THIS ?
SANTA !
NO, THAT'S STUPID TOO.
HOW ABOUT THIS ?
( all )NO.
NO.
OOH, VERY NICE.
NO.
NO.
DYNOMITE !
( all )NO !
WE HAVE RECENTLY COME ACROSSAN ALIEN TRANSMISSION
THAT IS BEING BEAMED THROUGHOUTTHE ENTIRE UNIVERSE.
( audience murmuring )
WHEN DECODED,IT LOOKS LIKE THIS.
WHAT DOES IT MEAN ?
IT'S SIMPLEMATHEMATICAL LANGUAGE
THAT CAN BE UNDERSTOODTHROUGHOUT THE SOLAR SYSTEM.
TRANSLATED INTO OUR LANGUAGE,IT LOOKS LIKE THIS.
( announcer )This Janamon at 8:00
it's everyone'sfavorite show--
Earth !
It's been 100 galgamarssince we first took species
from 17 different planets
and put them all togetheron the same planet !
They've foughtand fallen in love.
What will happenthis galgamar ?
Tune in Janamon at eightto find out !
It's Earth, on FOGNL !
I'M AFRAID THAT EARTH,ALL OF EARTH,
IS NOTHING BUT AN INTERGALACTICREALITY TV SHOW.
MY GOD.
WE'RE FAMOUS !
( cheering )
WAIT, YOU DON'TUNDERSTAND.
I'M ON TV !I'M ON TV !
OH, THIS IS SO AWESOME !
ALRIGHT, EARTHLINGS,IF YOU'LL STEP OVER THIS WAY
WE'LL ERASE YOUR MEMORIESAND GET YOU BACK TO EARTH.
( phone rings )OH, EXCUSE ME.
THIS IS NAJIX.
UH-HUH.
OH, NO.
OH, NO, REALLY ?
IT'S FOR SURE ?
ALRIGHT, I'LL BREAKTHE NEWS TO EVERYONE.
NO, NO, I UNDERSTAND,THANKS.
WELL, YOU KIDS CAN GOBACK TO EARTH IF YOU WANT
BUT I'M AFRAID IT WON'TBE THERE FOR LONG.
THE SHOW'S BEEN CANCELED.
WHAT ?WHO CANCELED US ?
THE UNIVERSALNETWORK HEADS.
THEY SAY THE EARTHLINGS HAVEBECOME AWARE OF THE SHOW
SO IT WON'T BEFUNNY ANYMORE.
OH ( bleep ),DID WE DO THAT ?
EVERYONE, CAN I HAVE YOURATTENTION REAL QUICK ?
UH, LOOK, I JUST GOT A CALLFROM THE NETWORK
AND I'M AFRAID EARTHHAS BEEN CANCELED.
( all )AWW...
NOW, NOW,IT WAS A GREAT RUN
AND I THINK WE SHOULD ALLBE REALLY PROUD.
( slight applause )
LET'S CALL INTHE DEMOLITION CREW
TO STRIKE THE EARTHFOR RESOURCES.
WAIT, WAIT !THEY CAN'T DO THIS !
LET US TALK TOTHE NETWORK HEADS !
WOULDN'T DO ANY GOOD.
DUDE, WE HAVE TO TRY !
PLEASE TAKE US TO THEM,PLEASE !
ALRIGHT, KIDS, WE'LL TAKE YOUTO THE NETWORK HEADS,
BUT I WARN YOU,NOBODY HAS EVER GOTTEN
THE EXECUTIVESTO UNCANCEL A SHOW
ONCE THE CALLHAS BEEN MADE.
NOBODY.
( beeping )
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT ?
THERE'S A HUGE SHIP OF SOME KINDIN EARTH'S ORBIT.
BUT WHY ?
WAIT A MINUTE--CHAOS THEORY !
CHAOS THEORY ?
CHAOS THEORY, IT WAS FIRSTTHOUGHT OF IN THE '60s, 60.
THAT'S THE NUMBER OF EPISODESTHEY MADE OF "PUNKY BREWSTER"
BEFORE IT WAS CANCELED.CANCELED ?
HUH ?
DON'T YOU SEE ?THE SHOW IS OVER.
THE ALIENS ARECANCELING EARTH !
OH MY GOD.
WE HAVE TO STOP THEM !
who control all mediain the universe !
CAN I HELP YOU ?
WE HAVE A 3'OCLOCK MEETING WITHTHE NETWORK HEADS.
WHERE ARE YOUVISITING FROM ?
UH, EARTH.
OOH !
I WATCH THAT SHOWALL THE TIME !
( laughing )
OH SURE, COME ON IN,EARTHLINGS !
WE'RE JUST CHECKINGOUR NEW SHOW.
WE TOOK 100 BEINGS FROMTHE PLANET MARKLAR
AND PUT THEM ON AN ASTEROIDWITH SENTIENT BEINGS
FROM THE HORSEHEAD NEBULA.
IT'S A RIOT !
THEY HATE EACH OTHER !
MIGHTY, POWERFULNETWORK EXECUTIVES.
WE HAVE COME A GREATDISTANCE IN ORDER TO--
I'M STARVING, YOU EARTHLINGSHAVE HAGLAR YET ?
OH YEAH, LET'S DO HAGLAR.
WHERE DO YOUWANT TO GO, MORONIS ?
NOT ON A FLECKMAR,TOO CROWDED.
OOH !BLACH-GA-FELCH !
OH, BLACH-GA-FELCH,PERFECT !
THIS PLACE IS FANTASTIC.
PLEASE DON'T CANCEL US,PLEASE.
I'M SORRY, EARTHLINGS,
BUT YOU HAVE TO REALIZETHE UNIVERSE IS A BUSINESS.
YOU MADE IT TO 100 EPISODES,YOU SHOULD BE PROUD.
YEAH, A SHOW SHOULD NEVERGO PAST 100 EPISODES
OR ELSE IT STARTS TO GET STALE
WITH RIDICULOUSLY STUPIDPLOT LINES AND SETTINGS.
HERE'S YOU ORDER OF GLAGAPLATZLFOR GNAKLEBERG !
BUT, SIRS, WE THINK OUR SHOWIS JUST GETTING GOOD.
I MEAN, WE'RE JUST NOWSTARTING TO SEE PEOPLE
GETTING REALLY PISSED OFFAT EACH OTHER.
OH MY GOD,THIS IS GREAT !
YOU MUST HAVE SOMEJOOZIAN ANCESTRY.
TELL US ABOUT IT.
LOOK, THERE'S FIVE BILLIONPEOPLE ON OUR SHOW,
YOU CAN'T JUST UP ANDCANCEL ON US.
OH MY GOD, WILL YOU LOOK AT THEHEKMAS ON THAT JOOZIMAK ?
DUDE, WE'RE TRYING TOSAVE OUR PLANET HERE !
LET'S TAKE THE EARTHLINGSTO A HEKMA BAR !
OH, YEAH !
OH YEAH, LET'S SEETHOSE HEKMAS !
SIRS, IF YOU'LL--
OH, MAN,I AM SO WASTED.
HEY, YOU EARTHLINGS WANNATRY A LITTLE BLANCGH ?
( snorting )
OH, YEAH !
OH, GLUCK YEAH !
KENNY !
MAN, SCREW THIS PLACE !
LET'S GO GET A HOTEL ROOMAND A HOOKER !
OH, YEAH !
THAT'S CAUSEI WAS HAVING THESE
BOGUS NIGHTMARESALL NIGHT LONG.
HEY YOU GUYS, LOOK !
WHAT THE HELL IS THAT ?
I DON'T KNOW.
HELLO THERE, CHILDREN !
( all )HEY, CHEF.
CHEF, KENNY HAS A PICTUREOF TWO GREEN THINGS
SUCKING EACH OTHER'SSHOULDERS.
WHAT IS IT, CHEF ?
I DON'T KNOW,
BUT SOMETHING TELLS METHIS PICTURE MIGHT BE
VERY IMPORTANT, CHILDREN.
YOU SHOULDHANG ON TO IT.
( announcer )ATTENTION UNIVERSE !
BE SURE TO TUNE INNEXT WEEK
FOR ANOTHER EXCITINGEPISODE OF EARTH !
THE ASIANS ARE REALLY STEWEDAT THE RUSSIANS.
THE ZEBRAS TRY TO GET ALONGWITH THE BUFFALO.
AND AMERICANS AND IRAQISHAVE AN ALL-OUT BRAWL !
IT'S OUTRAGEOUS FUNAND IT'S ALL NEW !
EARTH !ON FOGNL !
Cancelled
s07e04 March 19, 2003
The impact is worldwide when the visitors return to South Park and the boys discover that Earth is one big intergalactic reality show.
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