Stan Marsh ?

Yeah.

I'm Agent Clarkand this is Agent Marx.

We'd like to talk to you aboutyour Pinewood Derby car.

Aw, crap.

Dad !

Young man, what we'reabout to tell you

is a matter ofnational security.

Yesterday, every governmentand embassy on Earth

was contacted by...an alien life force.

Alien ?

Apparently, the alien cameacross your Pinewood Derby car

and it's now headedto our planet.

What does it want ?

We believe that theyintend to welcome us

into the Galactic Federationof Planets.

They will wantto meet the people

who discovered warp speedfor our species.

Stan, did you use allthe damn toilet paper again ?

Oh, crap !

What ?!What do you guys want ?!

We said we only usedwhat was in the kit !

You got nothing on us !

You got nothing onussssss !

Dad, they aren't herefor that !

Oh.

Hi, I'm Randy Marsh.

Mr. Marsh, we were justtelling your son

that thanks to you

we have made firstcontact with alien life.

What ?!

Hey-- hey, Sharon !

NASA has confirmedthat an alien ship

has entered our solar systemand is headed here.

So guess what.

Our Pinewood Derby carfound alien life in space.

What ?Oh, my God !

Yeah, but I guess it'sjust a dumb, little race

like you said,huh, Sharon ?