Do I really have todo this, Dad ?
Stan, now more than ever,
you need to understand theimportance of saving money.
But Grandma saidI could use this money
to buy whatever I want.
Okay, next please !
Go on, Stanley.
How can I help you,young man ?
I got a $100 checkfrom my grandma
and my dad saidI need to put in the bank
so it can grow overthe years.
Well, that's fantastic.
A really smart decision,young man.
We can put that check ina money-market mutual fund,
then we'll reinvestthe earnings into
with compounding interest and it's gone !
Uh, what ?
It's gone,it's all gone.
What's all gone ?
The money in your account,it didn't do too well.
What do you mean ?I have $100.
Not anymoreyou don't-- poof.
Well, what can I doto get back my--
I'm sorry, sir,but this line is for
bank members only.
I just openedan account !
Do you have any moneyinvested with this bank ?
No, you just lost it all.
Then please stand aside
for people who actuallyhave money with us.
Next please !
Hello, Mrs. Farnickle,how are you today ?
Making a deposit are we ?
Great, we can just put thatinto your retirement account
and make it go to workfor you and it's gone.
Sorry, yeah, that's gone.
Please step aside forpeople who actually
have moneywith the bank.
Next please.Dad !
Hey, I'm trying to teach my sonthe importance of savings !
You alreadylost his money ?
Oh, Mr. Marsh,
don't worry, we can justtransfer money
from your account intoa portfolio with your son's--
aaaand it's gone !
This line is for people whohave money with the bank only.
Please step aside !
( announcer )This is a 9 News Special Report.
An economic crisishas hit South Park
and the nationlike never before.
Another South Park bankhas closed down,
leaving thousandsof people in debt.
It's just crazy,you know ?
Everyone's affected by it.
It's like allthe money just vanished.
It's really terrifying.
We've got no money topay our mortgage now.
We could very easilylose our house.
Hi, Grandma !
First the moneystarted goin'
and now everyone'sgettin' laid off work !
They took our jobs !
They took our jobs !
Derk er derrrrrr !
Deeerkerrdrrr !Deeerkerrrrrrdrrrr !
Just how far willthe economy fall ?
We asked economic reporterDan Banks for his assessment.
We'll have the rest of Dan'sinterview tonight at 10.
All right, everyone,eat up.
Oh, Jesus Christ.
Sliced hot dogsand tomato slices ?!
You said we had to becareful with our money.
I've got nothing fora food budget !
Mom, Dad, how comethere's suddenly no money ?
I'll tell youwhat happened, son.
See, there's a bunchof idiots out there
who weren't happywith what they had.
They wanted a bigger houseand materialistic things
that they didn't even need--
people with no money who gotloans to buy frivolous things
they had no business buying.
And these assholes justblindly started buying
any stupid thingthat looked appealing
because they thought moneywas endless.
It goes back to when thegovernment had the idea
that everyone in Americadeserves to own a house...
( Margaritaville whirring )
So we have people having a hardtime paying their loans,
meaning less money coming in.
And the idiots couldn'tsee that by doing
all this frivolous spendingthey were mocking The Economy.
And they made The Economyvery angry.
We're all feelingThe Economy's vengeance
because of materialisticheathens
who did stupidthings with their money.
Do you understand, son ?
Yeah, I think I get it.
And so why is oureconomy failing us ?
Because the governmentkept interest rates
too low for too long !
The government tookour economy for granted
and now we are all herepaying the price !
How long will we sitand watch our economy fall...
... And so I say to you,
do not listen tothe Wall Street brokers,
for th are the ones who put usin this situation !
Fat cats with corporate greed.
They are the ones who knowinglydrove us down this pathway...
( Cartman )Where has all the money gone ?
It must havegone somewhere.
The answer is obvious,my friends.
It is the Jews--
covetous Jews,who have taken all our money
and hoarded it forthemselves,
hidden all the cashin some... secret Jew cave
that they built probablyback in the early '60s.
It is The Jews, my friends...
( Randy )Now we hear all different people
casting all differentkinds of blame
from person to person.
But the fault liesin all of you.
You, who boughtthat $300,000 house
when you only had 20,000to put down.
You, who bought that third car
even though only two peoplein your home drive.
It is time tostop pointing fingers !
Finger-pointing gets usnowhere !
We have mocked our Economy,
and now The Economy has castits vengeance upon us all.
This is the first guy toactually make sense.
Yea, it is an angryand unforgiving Economy.
To repent, we must stopfrivolous spending.
Instead of paying forcable, let us watch clouds !
Instead of buying clothes, wearbut sheets from thine beds !
Cut spending to onlythe bare essentials:
water and breadand Margaritas, yea.
Hello, young man,welcome to Sur La Table.
Can I help you ?
Yeah, I wanna return thisMargaritaville
my stupid dad bought.
Oh, that's allwe get anymore, returns.
Could you please just putthe receipt here
on this table ?
Sorry, our computers area little slow today.
We need a new Ethernet cable.
Oh, I'm sorry, sir, I'd liketo give you a refund
but I'm afraidit's not doable.
I said I'm not able, sir.
You see, this Margaritavillewas purchased
with a payment plan.So ?
Well, an outsidefinancing company
handles those payment plans.
Customers just payfor some of the machine
and the finance companypays for the rest.
Well, can't I just return itand get the money
my dad put in back ?
Hmm... that's improbablebut not impossible.
I'm not reallysure how it works.
You'll have to speak withthe people at the top.
I can give youthe finance company's address
if that's agreeablewith you.
We have become loversof pleasure
rather thanlovers of The Economy.
There are those who willsay that The Economy
has forsaken us.
Nay, you hath forsakenThe Economy !
And now you knowThe Economy's wrath.
Oh, thoust can shop ina sporting-goods store
but knowest thou thatThe Economy will take away
thy Broncos cap fromthine head.
You mockedThe Economy without fear.
Thine own stock brokers
now lie deadby their own hand.
And thou knowest thatthy stock broker
did not fear The Economy !
Well, here weare, my friends.
You have brought The Economy'svengeance upon yourselves.
What can we do, Randy ?
Yes, tell us !Tell us, what to do ?
Tell us, Randy,what we should do !What do we do, Randy ?!
We must all wear sheetsinstead of buying clothes
that need detergent.
Instead of cars thattake gasoline,
we can get around onllamas from Drake's farm !
Instead of video games thattake batteries and software
our kids will playwith squirrels !
We must let The Economy know
that we are capable ofrespecting it !
No more needless spending !
( cheering )
The Economyis our shepherd.
We shall not want.
( cheering )
Well, this sucks.
Sure was better when ourparents were buying us stuff.
Of all the times forpeople to decide
to stop buying things,
it had to bethe week that
Grand Theft Auto 4 comes outfor Nintendo DS !
You want something newevery week, fat ass.
Don't you fraternize me !
This is all yourfault, you know !
My fault ?!
The Jews took allthe money away and they--
Don't even start !Don't even start, Cartman !
Well, why are we wearingbed sheets
and playing withsquirrels, Kyle ?
Not because ofthe Jews, Butters !
Who told you that ?!
Well, Eric did.
Just tell us wherethe cave is, Kyle.
Now, look... the reason we'rein this situation
is because peopleare being stupid !
The Economy isn't somevengeful being
that takesthings away from us !
The Economy is justmade up of people.
And people have justlost their faith in it !
What people really should bedoing is spending more.
Spending is fine !
We best speak withthe council.
Tell them a young Jew
is speaking heresytowards The Economy.
South Park: Margaritaville - Act 1
Stan takes his $100 check and makes an investment into South Park Bank. Annndd it's gone.x CLOSE
The people of South Park talk about the dark economic times.x CLOSE
Randy explains exactly why the economy is so bad.x CLOSE
Everyone's preaching about the financial situation, but Randy's vision of a vengeful economy seems to draw the most attention.x CLOSE
Stan tries to return the Margaritaville to Sur La Table without success.x CLOSE
Randy's speeches about the economy and personal responsibility are gaining support.x CLOSE
The Boys are reduced to playing with squirrels.x CLOSE
Stan learns that returning the Margaritaville is more difficult than he thought.x CLOSE
Randy's Economic Recovery Committee learns of a child who is speaking out against the economy.x CLOSE
The townspeople punish Garrison for needless spending, but Kyle tries to stop him from being squirreled.x CLOSE