( Mysterion )I could no longersit by and watch
as my city becamea cesspool of crime.
I have lived in South Parkall my life.
I decided it was up tome to keep this town safe.
Nobody at school knowsmy double life.
To them, I'm justanother 4th grader.
But tonightI am Mysterion.
Ah, Mysterion,thank God you've come.
What news do you have ?
There's somegraffiti on the bridge again.
I think those 6th-grade kidsare doing it.
And the guy atthe movie theater
is harassing Mexicans again.
We'll get right on it,Mysterion.
Thank you forall your help.
God speed, Mysterion !
( Detective )You are a beacon of hope
in an otherwise bleakand dreary world !
I'm gonna kick the shit outof you if you don't stop.
The city needs my help.
It cries for protectionand I will
answer the callto save her.Answer the callto save her !
That's whatI'm supposed to say !
I know it's you, Kyle,just stop.
I don't havetime for this.
Fireworks are illegal inColorado, you asshole !
Hey, he's got fireworks !
( school bell ringing )
The Police get some helpful information from the mysterious Mysterion, and The Coon is starting to get pissed off.