( Kyle )THOSE PEOPLE ATTHE TOBACCO COMPANY
ALL SEEM REALLY NICE.
YEAH, YOU SEE THAT ?
THEY GOT INTOYOUR HEAD !
NOW YOU KIDS CAN MEET SOMEGOOD DECENT PEOPLE,
THE FOLKS WHO WORKTO GET SMOKING BANNED !
( growling )
( hissing )
THIS IS HOW WE GETRID OF SMOKERS !
WE GO STATE TO STATE AND DOTHINGS LIKE USE BOGUS STUDIES
AND MAKE EXPENSIVECOMMERCIALS
TO GET THE PUBLICON OUR SIDE
AND FORCE CIGARETTESMOKERS TO STOP !
WOW, IT'S LIKE, IT'S LIKESMOKING BRINGS A LOT OF PEOPLE
JUST A LITTLE BIT OF JOY
AND YOU GET TO TAKE THATAWAY FROM THEM.
YOU ARE SO AWESOME.
HERE YOU GO, BOB.
THIS ISMR. VALKRI,
HE DOES ALLOUR PHOTOSHOP WORK.
NOW ALL WE HAVE TO DOIS PHOTOSHOP CIGARETTES
INTO YOUR HANDS,AND BINGO !
WHEN THIS HITS THE PAPERS THETOBACCO COMPANY IS SCREWED !
HA HA HA HA !
HA HA HA HA !
BUT DUDE--YOU'RE MAKING STUFF UP.
YOU KIDS NEED TO UNDERSTANDSOMETHING, OKAY ?
SOMETIMES LYING IS OKAY,
LIKE WHEN YOU KNOW WHAT'S GOODFOR PEOPLE MORE THAN THEY DO.
OH MY GOD, THAT IS EXACTLYWHAT I'VE ALWAYS SAID.
I LOVE THIS GUY !
MR. REINER, YOUR BILLTO HAVE SMOKING
OUTLAWED IN BARS HEREDIDN'T PASS.
GOD DAMMIT, WHATTHE HELL IS WRONG
WITH PEOPLEIN THIS STATE ?!
APPARENTLY, SEVERAL PEOPLEHERE STILL BELIEVE
THERE'S NO PROOF SECONDHANDSMOKE CAN KILL YOU.
THEY WANT PROOF ?!
ALL RIGHT,WE'LL GIVE THEM PROOF !
BOYS, I NEED ONE OF YOU TO ACTIN A COMMERCIAL FOR US !
WE'LL SHOOT IT TOMORROW !
WOW, A COMMERCIAL ?!
YOU BOYS DECIDEWHICH ONE OF YOU
WOULD BE BESTFOR THE PART.
ALL RIGHT, PEOPLE, WE GOTTAGET MOVING ON THE BILL
TO BAN SMOKINGIN PARKS HERE !
LET'S GO !
GOD, HE'S JUST THE BEST !
MR. REINER !CAN I GET YOU A MUFFIN ?
OR A COLD DRINK PERHAPS ?
YOU GUYS, I THINK WE SHOULDBAIL OUT OF THIS RIGHT NOW.
I JUST KNOW WHERETHIS IS HEADING-
IT'S GONNA END UPWITH THE WHOLE TOWN
TAKING THIS TOO FAR
AND US HAVING TO TALKABOUT "WHAT WE LEARNED"
TO CHANGE EVERYONE'S MIND,
AND I SAY WE JUSTSTOP RIGHT NOW
AND GO PLAYCARDS OR SOMETHING.
YUP, I TOTALLY AGREE.
YEAH, MAYBEYOU'RE RIGHT.
SO, GENTLEMEN, LOOKSLIKE ONLY ONE OF US
GETS TO BE INTHE COMMERCIAL, HUH ?
WHO WILL IT BE... ?
GENTLEMEN,THE GAME IS ON !
WE DON'T WANT TO BE INTHEIR STUPID COMMERCIAL.
OH, I GET IT, KYLE.
THAT'S YOUR SERBIAN JEWDOUBLE BLUFF--
MAKE ME THINK YOU DON'T CAREABOUT BEING IN THE COMMERCIAL
SO THAT MAYBEI WON'T EITHER.
OOPS, DIDN'T WORK,DID IT, KYLE ?
NO, WE REALLY WANT NOTHING MORETO DO WITH THESE PEOPLE.
SURE YOU DON'T, KYLE.
OH, AND NEITHER DO I.
I KNOW WHAT YOU'REGONNA SAY NEXT.
YOU'RE GONNA SAY,"HOW ABOUT NONE OF US
SHOW UP TOMORROWTO DO IT ?"
AND THEN I'M SUPPOSED TOAGREE, SO THAT TOMORROW
YOU CAN WALTZ INALL BY YOURSELF
AND DO THE COMMERCIAL.
THAT'S SERBIAN JEWDOUBLE BLUFF,
AND IT AIN'TGONNA WORK ON ME.
HEH HEH HEH.
ONLY ONE OF US CAN BE INTHE COMMERCIAL, GENTLEMEN.
THE GAME-- IS ON.
Serbian Jew Double Bluff
Cartman wants to do an anti-smoking commercial for his new hero, Rob Reiner.
The impact is worldwide when the visitors return to South Park and the boys discover that Earth is one big intergalactic reality show.x CLOSE
When a recently disabled star visits South Park and steals Jimmy's limelight, he and Timmy fight back by forming a handicapped gang.x CLOSE
After convincing the boys to toilet paper their teacher's house, Cartman contemplates killing Kyle so he doesn't rat them all out.x CLOSE
When the boys join protesters to get out of school for a day, they find themselves in the middle of two opposing sides of the war issue.x CLOSE
The real Jenny From the Block is enraged when one of Cartman's body parts becomes too famous for its own good.x CLOSE
After starting their own South Park detective agency, the boys are officially named junior deputies by the police department.x CLOSE
Forced off their land by the owners of the Three Feathers Indian Casino, the boys rally South Park to fight the rich and powerful Indians.x CLOSE
The boys are hot to be gay once the metrosexual craze hits South Park, and Mr. Garrison accuses the Queer Eye guys of selling out.x CLOSE
Cartman hits the top of the charts with his own Christian rock band, and the boys get arrested for downloading music on the Internet.x CLOSE
After South Park's senior citizens mow down a few farmers' markets, the boys decide to take action against the older generation.x CLOSE
The motivational group "Butt Out" visits South Park Elementary to warn the kids about smoking.x CLOSE
The boys take up smoking and accidentally burn down the school.x CLOSE
The boys get a tour of the Big Tobacco Co.x CLOSE
Rob Reiner declares war on the tobacco companies of America.x CLOSE
Kyle wants to come clean about why they tried smoking before things get out of hand.x CLOSE
Rob Reiner is shocked that smoking is still legal in Colorado bars.x CLOSE
Cartman wants to do an anti-smoking commercial for his new hero, Rob Reiner.x CLOSE
Cartman tries to barricade Kyle in his room so that he won't try to be in Rob Reiner's commercial.x CLOSE
Rob Reiner wants to use Cartman's dead body as a symbol for anti-smoking.x CLOSE
Cartman escapes Rob Reiner and wants to go to the Big Tobacco Co. for help.x CLOSE