WE HAVE EVIDENCE THATSADDAM HUSSEIN IS UP THERE
BUILDING WEAPONSOF MASS DESTRUCTION.
WE HAVE TRIED TO COMMUNICATEWITH SADDAM, THROUGH A PSYCHIC,
TO ASK HIM TO LET US SEEHIS WAREHOUSES IN HEAVEN,
BUT HE HAS NOTRESPONDED.
OF COURSE HE HAS NOT RESPONDEDBECAUSE HE'S DEAD !
RIGHT, DEADAND IN HEAVEN.
THIS ISPREPOSTEROUS !
EVEN IF THEREWAS A HEAVEN,
WHAT MAKES YOU THINKSADDAM HUSSEIN'S SOUL
WOULD BE SENT THERE ?
OUR INTELLIGENCETELLS US
THAT WHEN SADDAM WASORIGINALLY KILLED
HIS SOUL ACTUALLYWENT TO HELL.
BUT WHILE IN HELL HE BEGANA HOMOSEXUAL RELATIONSHIP
WITH SATAN,THE PRINCE OF DARKNESS.
SATAN, HOWEVER, DECIDEDHE DIDN'T WANNA BE WITHHUSSEIN ANYMORE
AND BROKE UP WITH HIMAROUND AUGUST.
WHEN SADDAM BECAME JEALOUSAND TRIED TO KILL SATAN'SNEW LOVER, CHRIS,
SATAN HAD SADDAM SENT TO HEAVENTO LIVE WITH THE MORMONS
ARE YOU HIGH OR JUSTINCREDIBLY STUPID ?
I ASSURE YOU--I AM NOT HIGH.
The Case for War
At the United Nations, President Bush presents his case for war with Saddam Hussein.
News 4 does a story about the boys' ladder to heaven.x CLOSE
The ladder breaks through the clouds, but Heaven is still nowhere in sight.x CLOSE
Cartman reveals that he drank Kenny's ashes and realizes that they are the cause of his hallucinations.x CLOSE
The boys realize that Kenny, who died, had the ticket stub they need to claim a five-minute candy shopping spree.x CLOSE
The boys go to Kenny's house to try and find the ticket stub.x CLOSE
Not realizing that the powder in the urn is Kenny's ashes, Cartman mixes them into "chocolate" milk.x CLOSE
The adults stand around weeping while the boys begin their ladder to heaven.x CLOSE
Japan reveals it is building it's own ladder to heaven, quicker and more efficiently.x CLOSE
The military arrives to help build the ladder to heaven.x CLOSE
Now that more Americans believe in heaven, they feel that we should bomb it.x CLOSE