HOW WAS IT ?
OH DUDE,YOU SCREWED ME UP !HUH ?
THE GUY IN THERE SAIDI HAVE TO SAY 54 "HAIL MARYs".
NOW I CAN'T REMEMBER IFI WAS ON NUMBER 7 OR 8 !
WHO'S IN THERE ?I DON'T KNOW.
YOU CAN'T SEE HIM,IT'S JUST SOME ANONYMOUS GUY.
WELL, HERE GOESEVERYTHING !
UH, FORGIVE ME, FATHER,FOR I HAVE SINNED.
BLESSED ART THOU, CHILD.
NOW, WHAT DO YOUHAVE TO CONFESS ?
WELL, LET'S SEE...
I'D LIKE TO START, IF I MAY,BACK WHEN I WAS TWO AND A HALF.
IT WAS A COLD, APRIL MORNINGAND THE DEW ON THE GRASS
WAS FROZEN LIKETINY BEADS OF GLASS.
HAIL MARY, FULL OF GRACETHE LORD IS WITH THEE-Hey, dude.
GOD DAMMIT !What ?
OOH, THERE'S SISTER ANNE,COME ON WE GOTTA ASK HERABOUT TIMMY !
SISTER ANNE !OH, HELLO, CHILDREN.
WE HAVE A QUESTION.OKAY, SHOOT.
WHERE DO HANDICAPPED PEOPLEGO WHEN THEY DIE ?
THE HANDICAPPED ARE JUSTPEOPLE LIKE YOU AND ME,SO THE SAME RULES APPLY.
THEY NEED TO BE BAPTIZED,TAKE COMMUNION ANDCONFESS THEIR SINS.
BUT OUR FRIEND TIMMY CAN'TREALLY TALK, ALL HE CAN DOIS SAY HIS OWN NAME,
SO HE CAN'T REALLYCONFESS HIS SINS, SO ISHE GOING TO GO TO HELL ?
THIS REALLY ISN'T A QUESTIONFOR ME, IT'S FOR THE PRIEST.
I'LL SEE IFI CAN FIND HIM, BYE !
AND THAT WAS ABOUT EVERYTHINGFROM FIRST GRADE,
THEN LAST YEAR, WELL...
YOU CAN'T TELL ANYBODYABOUT THIS STUFF, RIGHT ?
YOUR CONFESSION DOES NOTLEAVE THIS BOX.
OKAY, BECAUSE LAST YEAR,
I TOOK A SANDWICH THATTHE PRIEST OF THIS CHURCHHAD BEEN EATING.
I'M SURE HE WOULDFORGIVE YOU,
IF HE KNEW.
YEAH, BUT I'M NOTFINISHED YET.
I TOOK A SANDWICHTHAT THE PREIST WAS EATING,
TOOK THE PIECE OF HAMOUT OF IT, PUT ITBETWEEN MY BUTT CHEEKS,
THEN PUT THE SANDWICH BACKAND WATCHED HIM EAT IT.
YEAH, AND THEN THISOTHER TIME, I WENT PEE-PEEIN THE HOLY WATER THING
AND THE PRIEST BLESSED HIMSELFON THE FOREHEAD WITH IT
EVERY DAY FORABOUT A WEEK.
AND THEN ONE TIME,I WAS AT THE PARK
AND THE PRIEST WAS OUTWALKING HIS DOG,
AND I WENT NUMBER TWOON THE SIDEWALK
AND THEN TOLD OFFICER BARBRADYTHAT IT WAS THE PRIEST'S DOG,
AND SO THE PRIESTGOT FINED LIKE $100FOR NOT CLEANING IT UP.
AND THEN THIS ONE TIME,
I PUT SUPER GLUEALL OVER THE PRIEST'S BIBLE--
AH, AH, OH, JESUS,AAGHGH !
AAGHH ! AAAGH !
Ah, ah, help !
FATHER, I NEEDTO TALK TO YOU ?
FATHER, I HAVE TOASK YOU A QUESTION.
OKAY, OKAY, FINE.
OH, OH !
DUDE, WHAT HAPPENED ?
I FELT IT YOU GUYS !
I FELTTHE ANGRY HANDS OF GOD !
HE IS AN ANGRY GOD,YOU GUYS.
WE ALL HAVE TO STARTTAKING THIS VERY SERIOUSLY !
Angry Hand of God
Priest Maxi wrings Cartman's neck during his confession.
The boys start stealing teeth from less fortunate children and selling them to the Tooth Fairy at a premium.x CLOSE
The girls of South Park Elementary challenge the boys to a sledding race and Cartman gets sentenced to Juvenile Hall for 13 years.x CLOSE
Timmy is excused from class when he is diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder.x CLOSE
A family of quintuplets takes up residence in South Park and a media circus surrounds their every move.x CLOSE
Cartman goes online to find older friends when he decides that Stan, Kenny and Kyle are too immature to be his friends.x CLOSE
Kyle needs a kidney transplant and Cartman is discovered to be the perfect donor. Cartman offers his kidney to Kyle -- for the price of 10 million dollars.x CLOSE
Chef's passionate protest against the South Park flag enflames the entire town, including the children.x CLOSE
The boys form their own boy band, and everyone in town is lining up to audition for a spot as the fifth band member.x CLOSE
Priest Maxi's threats of eternal damnation have the boys racing to make their first Confession and Holy Communion.x CLOSE
Satan is torn between two lovers as he tries to choose between his new boyfriend and his ex, Saddam Hussein.x CLOSE
It's Luau Sunday in Hell.x CLOSE
Saddam wants Satan back.x CLOSE
Kyle takes Ike to eat crackers and confess so they won't burn in hell.x CLOSE
Sister Anne explains why Christians eat Jesus.x CLOSE
Satan tells Chris that Saddam is back.x CLOSE
The boys are worried that Timmy might go to Hell.x CLOSE
Satan weighs the pros and cons of Chris and Saddam.x CLOSE
Priest Maxi wrings Cartman's neck during his confession.x CLOSE
Timmy, Ike and Kyle get baptized.x CLOSE
If the boys don't confess soon, they're doomed.x CLOSE