And so today,South Park held a parade
to honor Officer Barbrady
and his heroic workon the chicken !@#$% case.
THANK YOU, EVERYBODY,THANK YOU !
SPEECH, SPEECH !
THEY WANT YOU TO GIVE A SPEECH.
ABOUT THE WHOLE EXPERIENCEOVER THE LAST COUPLE OF DAYS.
WELL, FIRST OF ALL
I'D LIKE TO THANKTHE TOWN OF SOUTH PARK,
THE TOWN THAT BORE ME
AND EVENTUALLY WILL ROB ME OF MY LIFE PRECIOUS.
SECOND, I'D LIKE TO SAYTO ALL THOSE OUT THERE
WHO THINK THEY CAN SCREW CHICKENS
JUST TO TEACH PEOPLE TO READ,
YOUR DAYS ARE NUMBERED !
AND FINALLY I'D LIKE TO SAY
THAT READINGTOTALLY SUCKS ASS.
( together )HURRAY !
YES, AT FIRST I WAS HAPPYTO BE LEARNING HOW TO READ.
IT SEEMED EXCITINGAND MAGICAL,
BUT THEN I READ THIS,
"ATLAS SHRUGGED", BY AYN RAND.
I READ EVERY LAST WORD OF THIS GARBAGE
AND BECAUSE OFTHIS PIECE OF !@#$%
I'M NEVERREADING AGAIN !
( together )HURRAY FOR BARBRADY !
I GUESS READINGREALLY DOES SUCK ASS.
THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN SAYINGALL ALONG, YOU GUYS.
I'M JUST GLAD EVERYTHINGTURNED OUT OKAY,
AND BARBRADYGOT HIS JOB BACK.
IT'S POETIC JUSTICE.
Although it's helped him solve a case, Officer Barbrady vows never to read again.
Officer Barbrady checks out the scene of the Chickenlover's first crime.x CLOSE
The mayor threatens Officer Barbrady's job, so he enlists the boys' help.x CLOSE
Officer Barbrady and the boys catch the Chickenfucker red-handed.x CLOSE
The boys check out the Booktastic Busx CLOSE
Officer Barbrady talks to the "Cops" cameras.x CLOSE
Officer Barbrady tries to order food from a drive-thru bank teller.x CLOSE
Officer Barbrady has a breakdown at a press conference.x CLOSE
With riots on the streets, the mayor orders Officer Barbrady back to schoolx CLOSE
Officer Barbrady tries to read from the board in the boys' class.x CLOSE
The Chickenfucker fucks a chicken.x CLOSE