NO KITTY, THIS ISMY CORNED BEEF CABBAGE !
NO, KITTY,THAT'S A BAD KITTY !
HOW IS YOUR BEEFY ROAST,SNOOKUMS ?
MOM, CAN I ASK YOUA QUESTION ?
YOU KNOW HOW MY FRIEND STANHAS LIKE A DAD ?
AND MY FRIENDKYLE HAS ADAD ?
AND MY FRIENDKENNY HAS A DAD ?
WHAT'S YOURQUESTION, HON ?
GODDAMNIT,DO I HAVE A DAD ?!
I WANT TO KNOWWHERE I CAME FROM !
HMM, WELL,YOU SEE, ERIC,
SOMETIMES WHENA MAN AND A WOMAN
ARE ATTRACTEDTO EACH OTHER,
THEY WANT TO BECLOSE TO EACH OTHER.
AND SOMETIMES THE MANPUTS HISHOO-HOO-DILLY
IN THE WOMAN'SCHA-CHA.
SO WHO PUT HIS HOO-HOO-DILLYIN YOUR CHA-CHA ?
ERIC, THE DAYI MET YOUR FATHER
IT WAS LIKE MAGIC.
IT WAS A BEAUTIFULAUTUMN NIGHT
WHEN THE ASPEN TREESWERE TURNING,
AT THE 12th ANNUALDRUNKEN BARN DANCE.
( Mrs. Cartman )I WAS YOUNGAND NAIVE THEN.
WOW, I'VE NEVER SEEN A WOMANDRINK THAT MUCH.
YOU'RE AMAZING,MISS CARTMAN !
OH, HECK, I HAVEN'TEVEN STARTED YET.
I BAKED COOKIES,WOULD ANYBODY LIKE ONE ?
I WOULDN'T MINDGETTING AHOLD
OFYOUR COOKIES,MISS CARTMAN.
WELL, GO RIGHT AHEAD,OFFICER BARBRADY.
MMM, THAT'SA GOOD COOKIE.
LET'S DO THEDRUNKEN BARN DANCE !
( Mrs. Cartman )AND THEN I SAW HIM.
HE WAS THEMOST BEAUTIFUL,
CHARMING PIECE OF ASSI'D EVER SEEN IN SOUTH PARK.
HIS NAME WASCHIEF RUNNING WATER.
♪ THERE YOU ARE
♪ LIKE ATHROBBING STAR ♪
♪ I WANT YOU
♪ TO MAKELOVE TO ME ♪
I DON'T RECALL EXACTLYHOW THE REST OF THE NIGHT WENT.
BUT THE NEXT MORNINGI WAS PREGNANT WITHYOU,
MY LITTLEBLUEBERRY MUFFIN.
SO WHERE IS CHIEF RUNNING--I MEAN DAD, NOW ?
I NEVER SAW HIMAFTER THAT.
I WASN'T REALLYTHAT INTERESTED IN HIM.
THAT ISN'T A VERYROMANTIC STORY, MOM !
I HEARD HE STILL LIVESON THE UTE RESERVATION
JUST OUTSIDE OF TOWN.
TO THINK ALL THIS TIME,I'M ACTUALLY A NAIVE AMERICAN.
NO KITTY,BAD KITTY !
Drunken Barn Dance
Cartman's mom tells him the story of how she met his father.
Aliens land in South Park and kidnap Kyle's little brother.x CLOSE
Cartman wins the school's essay contest, and a celebrity comes to town.x CLOSE
The boys' hunting trip is threatened by activity from a nearby volcano and a mysterious creature.x CLOSE
Stan's dog explores his sexuality.x CLOSE
A genetic engineering experiment unleashes Stan's mutant twin.x CLOSE
With the help of Stan's grandfather, the kids summon the Grim Reaper.x CLOSE
Trick or treat in South Park is interrupted by an outbreak of "Pink Eye."x CLOSE
Government authorities mistake Cartman for a starving African child and send him to Ethiopia.x CLOSE
When Kyle's musical holiday pal Mr. Hankey shows up, it makes for a memorable Christmas in South Park.x CLOSE
Jesus and Satan fight a battle for spiritual domination, which conflicts with Cartman's birthday party.x CLOSE
Cartman has an emotional problem that is causing him to talk to his stuffed animals.x CLOSE
Chef recounts his version of the Drunken Barn Dance events to Cartman.x CLOSE
Before Dr. Mephisto can reveal who Cartman's Dad is, he is shot.x CLOSE
Cartman's mom tells him the story of how she met his father.x CLOSE
The boys decide to submit their video of Cartman to "America's Stupidest Home Videos."x CLOSE
Cartman learns from Chief Running Water that his Mom was last seen with Chef.x CLOSE
Cartman, now sure he's Chef's son, starts acting likehis version of black people.x CLOSE
The boys watch their video appear on "America's Stupidest Home Videos."x CLOSE
Cartman learns that many people have slept with his Mom, so he may never know who his father is.x CLOSE
Stan and Kyle promise Cartman $3,000 if their video wins the grand prize.x CLOSE