AND DID YOU SEEHER LAZY EYE ?
YOU CAN'T EVEN TELLWHO SHE'S LOOKING AT.
YOU GUYS AREALL SUCH PUSSIES !
I CAN'T TAKE IT, MAN !
WRITING IN CURSIVE, FRACTIONS--I CAN'T DO IT !
THIS IS IT,THE END OF INNOCENCE.
THIS IS THE LOSS OF THATPLAYFUL YOUTH ALL OUR PARENTSWARNED US ABOUT.
I JUST DIDN'T THINKIT WOULD COME SO SOON.
YEAH, ONLY NOWDO WE REALIZE
HOW MUCH WE ALL TOOKTHE THIRD GRADE FOR GRANTED.HUH ?
EVERYTHING WAS GREATIN THIRD GRADE,
AND NOW THAT IT'S ALL OVERWE'RE STARTING TO SEEJUST HOW SPECIAL IT WAS.
( touching piano music )♪ REMEMBER HOW IT USED TO BEIN THE THIRD GRADE ♪
♪ WE USED TO LAUGH AND PLAYAND CHERISH EACH DAY ♪
♪ IN THE THIRD GRADE
♪ WE LEARNED WONDROUS THINGSFROM OUR TEACHER SO NICE ♪
♪ SAT ON MARSHMALLOW DESKSWITH TEDDY-BEAR SMILES ♪
♪ THE WORLD SEEMED TOALL MAKE SENSE ♪
♪ BUT THAT SENSE SEEMSTO SLOWLY FADE ♪
♪ AFTER THIRD GRADE
♪ IN THIRD GRADE WE USED TOWRITE WITH CRAYONS ♪
♪ WE WOULD MAKE SPARKLY PICTURESWITH GLITTER AND GLUE ♪
♪ WE HAD WARM COOKIESAND HEARTS FULL OF LOVE ♪
♪ AND THERE WASN'T A CAREIN THE WORLD FOR ME ♪
♪ OR FOR YOU
♪ THERE'S NOT A THINGIN THIS LIFE ♪
♪ THAT I WOULDN'T TRADE
♪ JUST TO GO BACKFOR ONE MINUTE ♪
♪ TO THIRD GRADE ♪
( sobbing )
WOW, I HAD ALREADYFORGOTTEN HOW GREATTHIRD GRADE WAS.
OH, SURE WAS.
WISH I WASSTILL THERE.
HEY, THAT'S IT-- WE GOTTAGO BACK TO THIRD GRADE.
WE TRAVELBACK IN TIME.
OH, YEAH,TIME TRAVEL !
HOW WE GONNA DO THAT ?DOES IT HURT ?
I DON'T WANNA DO ITIF IT HURTS.
OR IF IT MAKES YOUGET ALL STICKY.
IT CAN'T BE THAT BAD,PEOPLE DO IT ON TV ALL THE TIME.
YEAH, WE JUST HAVE TOFIND SOMEBODY WHO KNOWSHOW TO DO IT.
WHAT ABOUT THOSE TWO COLLEGEGUYS NEXT DOOR TO ME ?
THEY'RE ALWAYS DOINGSCIENCE EXPERIMENTSIN THEIR BASEMENT.
YEAH, IF THERE'S A WAYTO TRAVEL BACK IN TIME,THOSE TWO DORKS WILL KNOW HOW.
WHEN IT COMES TOTIME TRAVEL THEORY
THERE ARE BASICALLYTWO SCHOOLS OF THOUGHT.
THE "SPOCK THEORY" IS THATA SLINGSHOT AROUND THE SUN
COULD CREATE A WORMHOLEIN WHICH TIME COULD NOT ESCAPE.
THE "LT. COMMANDERDATA THEORY", HOWEVER,
IS THAT A MAGNETIC VIBRATIONCOULD CREATE A RIP IN THETIME-SPACE CONTINUUM--
LOOK, WHATEVER IT TAKES,WE JUST HAVE TO GET BACKTO THIRD GRADE.
TIME TRAVELIS NO LAUGHING MATTER.
FOUR TIMES THE "ENTERPRISE"TRAVELED BACK IN TIME
AND FOUR TIMES THEY ALMOSTDIDN'T MAKE IT BACK.
WE DON'T WANT TO MAKE IT BACK,WE WANT TO STAY THERE.
OHH.SO, CAN YOU DO IT ?
IT'S ALL THEORETICAL, BUT FROMA SCIENTIFIC STANDPOINT
THE CREATION OF A RIPIN SPACE-TIME IS POSSIBLE.
Captioning made possible by COMEDY CENTRALWE JUST NEED TO FINDAN INERTIA DEVICE.
HEY, THIS KID'S ELECTRICWHEELCHAIR MIGHT BEJUST WHAT WE NEED.
Third Grade Memories
The students decide they want to time-travel back to the third grade.
The boys start stealing teeth from less fortunate children and selling them to the Tooth Fairy at a premium.x CLOSE
The girls of South Park Elementary challenge the boys to a sledding race and Cartman gets sentenced to Juvenile Hall for 13 years.x CLOSE
Timmy is excused from class when he is diagnosed with Attention Deficit Disorder.x CLOSE
A family of quintuplets takes up residence in South Park and a media circus surrounds their every move.x CLOSE
Cartman goes online to find older friends when he decides that Stan, Kenny and Kyle are too immature to be his friends.x CLOSE
Kyle needs a kidney transplant and Cartman is discovered to be the perfect donor. Cartman offers his kidney to Kyle -- for the price of 10 million dollars.x CLOSE
Chef's passionate protest against the South Park flag enflames the entire town, including the children.x CLOSE
The boys form their own boy band, and everyone in town is lining up to audition for a spot as the fifth band member.x CLOSE
Priest Maxi's threats of eternal damnation have the boys racing to make their first Confession and Holy Communion.x CLOSE
Satan is torn between two lovers as he tries to choose between his new boyfriend and his ex, Saddam Hussein.x CLOSE
The students decide they want to time-travel back to the third grade.x CLOSE
Timmy's wheelchair is out of control and set with explosives.x CLOSE
The new fourth graders decide to moon their new teacher.x CLOSE
Ms. Choksondik is a mean lady with flabby breasts.x CLOSE
Ms. Choksondik asks to speak to Mr. Garrison.x CLOSE
Ms. Chosondik learns the story of Mr. Garrison.x CLOSE
Timmy time travels out of South Park.x CLOSE
Ms. Choksondik seeks out Mr. Garrison's guidance.x CLOSE
The kids need to reunite the nerds to get another time machine built.x CLOSE
Mr. Garrison trains Ms. Choksondik.x CLOSE