KENNY !SHUT UP, KENNY !
YOU SHUT UP, FAT ASS !
HANG IN THERE, SWEETIEWE'LL BE THERE SOON.
WELCOME ABOARD SCOTLAND AIR.
OUR TRIP TO EDINBURGH SHOULDTAKE ABOUT TWELVE HOURS.
TWELVE HOURS ?
JESUS CHRIST !
IN THE MEANTIME, WE'D LIKE TOSHOW YOU A COMPLIMENTARY FILM.
ROB SCHNEIDER IS AWALL STREET EXECUTIVE.
WITH EVERYTHINGGOING FOR HIM !
ONLY PROBLEM IS
HE'S ABOUT TO BECOME...
A CARROT !
I'M A CARROT !
IT'S TWENTY FOURCARROT COMEDY !
ROB SCHNEIDER IS...
"A CARROT"RATED PG-13.
OH FOR THE,LOVE OF CHRIST.
I WANNA WATCH,FAT BOY !
NO KENNY,IT'S NOT FUNNY !
KYLE - KYLE !
Captioning made possible by COMEDY CENTRALTO STOP ME STAN,
THIS IS WHATMY GRANDMA WANTS !
LOOK, I WENT AND SAWTHAT JOHN EDWARD GUY.
HE'S JUST A BIG DOUCHE.
HE'S NOT A DOUCHE !
HE TALKEDTO MY GRANDMA !
KYLE, YOU CAN'TRUN YOUR LIFE BASED ON
WHAT SOME DOUCHIEPSYCHIC SAID.
THEY ALL JUST USE A TECHNIQUECALLED "COLD READING".
THEY'VE USED IT FORHUNDREDS OF YEARS
TO MAKE PEOPLEBELIEVE THEM.
HEY, WOA NOW,JOHN EDWARD IS FOR REAL !
NO, HE'S NOT.
YEAH, MY SISTERTOLD ME
HE KNEW OUR MOTHER'S NAMEAND WHEN SHE DIED !
JOHN EDWARD ?
OH YEAH, I HEARD HE WALKED UPTO A GUY ON THE STREET
AND SAID HIS DEAD FATHERWANTED TO SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY
AND IT WAS HIS BIRTHDAY !
YEAH, KID, HOW DOYOU EXPLAIN THAT ?
ALRIGHT, LOOKI'LL SHOW YOU.
I JUST NEED A VOLUNTEER,HOW ABOUT YOU ?
OHHH, ME !
( applause )
OKAY, I'M GOING TOPRETEND THAT A DEAD PERSON
IS TALKING TO MEABOUT YOU, OKAY ?
OKAY, WATCH KYLE.
IT'S AN OLDER MAN--SOMEONE VERY CLOSE TO YOU.
MY FATHER ?
DOES THIS MONTH, NOVEMBER,HOLD A SPECIAL SIGNIFICANCE ?
MY BIRTHDAYIS IN NOVEMBER !
RIGHT, BECAUSE HE'S SAYING"TELL HER HAPPY BIRTHDAY".
OH MY GOD !
SEE KYLE, I JUST STARTED WITHSOMETHING REALLY VAGUE.
I CHOSE "OLDER MAN"BECAUSE I'M BETTING
THAT BASED ON THIS WOMAN'S AGEHER FATHER IS MOST LIKELY DEAD.
BUT IF HERFATHER WASN'T DEAD
I COULD STILL SAY IT WASSOME OTHER OLDER MAN.
BUT HOW'D YOU KNOWHER BIRTHDAY WASIN NOVEMBER ?
I DIDN'T, I ASKED HER IFNOVEMBER MEANT ANYTHING.
HER FATHER COULD HAVEDIED IN NOVEMBER
OR THANKSGIVING WASREALLY SPECIAL FOR THEM
BUT I GO WITH THE BIRTHDAYAND VALIDATE NOW AS IF I KNEW
BY SAYING, "HE WISHES YOUA HAPPY BIRTHDAY".
WHAT ELSE DOES HE SAY ?
OKAY, I'LL JUST USEAN OLD STANDARD...
HE'S SAYING, "THE MONEY--STOP WORRYING ABOUT THE MONEY".
OH MY GOD...
MY SISTER AND I HAVE BEENFIGHTING OVER HIS INHERITANCE !
THAT'S AMAZING !
NO, IT ISN'T.
WHEN A FATHER DIESINHERITANCE IS USUALLY AN ISSUE.
AND MONEY IS SOMETHINGEVERYONE WORRIES ABOUT.
THAT SOUNDS A LITTLETOO COINCIDENTAL.
YES, THERE'S ONLYONE EXPLANATION.
THIS KID CAN COMMUNICATEWITH THE DEAD !
WOW !WOW !WOAAA !
DO ME NEXT, I WANT TOTALK TO MY MOTHER !
CAN YOU TRY TO REACHMY GRANDFATHER ?
YOU HAVE TO TELL ME
IF MY SISTER ISIN A GOOD PLACE !
ME NEXT !I'LL PAY YOU !
KID, HOW WOULD YOULIKE YOUR OWN
"TALKING TO THE DEAD" SHOW ?
Stan wows pedestrians in New York.
With the popularity of a new weight loss program, the boys see their opportunity to become sponsored by a major restaurant chain.x CLOSE
When the boys travel to Aspen and hit the slopes for the first time, Stan has a run-in with one of the locals and is challenged to a race.x CLOSE
The boys sign Butters up as a guest on a popular afternoon talk show that features people with weird deformities.x CLOSE
When the boys kidnap baby calves to save them from becoming sweet juicy veal steaks, the police show up and a standoff ensues.x CLOSE
All the kids in South Park are wild with anticipation to see the first trailer for the latest Terrance and Phillip movie.x CLOSE
The boys fire Butters as their friend, unleashing his dark side.x CLOSE
Cartman tries to retrieve his Sea Men from Ms. Choksondik's stomach, while Professor Chaos plans to destroy the world.x CLOSE
Priest Maxi travels to Rome when the Catholic Church scandal begins to impact church attendance in South Park.x CLOSE
The boys take on a cause when they realize that their favorite films are being enhanced, re-released and ruined in the process.x CLOSE
Bebe is the first girl in the fourth grade to "develop," threatening the boys' friendship and society in general.x CLOSE
Cartman goes to Scotland to seek help from Chef's parents.x CLOSE
Stan wows pedestrians in New York.x CLOSE
John Edward is a phony douche.x CLOSE
Cartman is rushed to the emergency room.x CLOSE
Chef, Mrs. Cartman and the boys fly to New York.x CLOSE
Chef's parents can tell Cartman is possessed.x CLOSE
Stan gets his own show and uses it to prove his point.x CLOSE
Chef forgets to bring a child for sacrifice.x CLOSE
John Edward challenges Stan to a psychic showdown.x CLOSE
Kenny's soul takes over a pot roast.x CLOSE