STEP ON UP AND GET"MR. HANKEY AND ME" T-SHIRTS !
GET THEM WHILE THEY LAST FOLKS,ONLY $14.95 !
I'LL TAKE TWO.
SELLING T-SHIRTSKICKS ASS.
I'M PLEASED TO ANNOUNCEON THIS GALA OPENING OF"HOLLYWOOD PLANET SOUTH PARK",
THAT THE FESTIVALWILL BE BACK NEXT YEAR,
AND THE YEAR AFTER THAT,AND THE YEAR AFTER THAT,AND SO ON.
RELEASE THE CURTAIN !
I GIVE YOU:HOLLYWOOD IN SOUTH PARK,HA HA HA !
WAIT, I BROUGHT HIMTO SHOW YOU !
NOT THIS AGAIN.
BEHOLD,MR. HANKEY !
HOOOOWDY HO !
ANYWAY,THIS NEW "HOLLYWOOD PLANET",
WILL BE THE OFFICIALMEETING PLACE--
HOWDY HO, FOLKS,I'M AFRAID MY BUDDY WAS RIGHT,
THERE'S NOT ENOUGH ROOMIN "SOUTH PARK"TO ACCOMMODATE A FESTIVAL.
MR. POO, IF YOU WOULDN'T MIND,WE CAN'T HEAR.
IF YOU CAN JUSTTURN YOURSELF DOWN,
YOU'RE AT ABOUT 7 RIGHT NOW,WE NEED YOU AT 3, O.K. ?
AW, FOLKS, PLEASE.
LITTLE TOWNS SIMPLY AREN'TMEANT FOR BIG EVENTS.
WE LOVE HAVING VISITORS,BUT GOD, TOO MANY OF YAIS HURTING MY ECOSYSTEM.
BESIDES, FILM FESTIVALSSHOULDN'T BE ABOUT
WHAT CELEBRITIES ARE COMING,OR WHAT FILM IS GONNA GET SHOWN,
IT SHOULD BE ABOUT PEOPLEGETTIN' TOGETHER,AND WATCHIN' MOVIES,
AND ABOUT PEOPLE WHO COULD NEVERGET THEIR MOVIE SEEN,
HAVIN' A CHANCETO HAVE IT WATCHED.
IF ONLY ONCE.
A GOOD FILM FESTIVALSHOULD BE SOMETHINGWHERE YA'LL SAY,
"LET'S FORGET ABOUT LAWYERS,AND AGENTS AND STUDIOSAND CELEBRITIES FOR A WHILE,
"AND JUST WATCHSOME NEW ART."
I...HAVE HAD ENOUGHOF YOU !
AHH !NO !
AS I WAS SAYING, THIS SHALLUSHER IN A WHOLE NEW DECADEOF FILM...
OH, HE'S DEAD,MR. HANKEY'S DEAD !
WELL, THIS WORKEDONCE BEFORE.
YOUR BIG CHOCOLATE BALLSARE JUST THE TRICK.
WHAT THE HELLIS HE DOING ?
( magical music playing )
OH, MY GOD !
NO !AH !
OH, MY GOD,AHHH !
IT SMELLS,IT SMELLS !
COME ON,THE POO IS COMING !!
I'M TRYING, DAMMIT !
LET'S GET OUTOF THIS TOWN !
GOSH, I GUESS I DON'TKNOW MY OWN STRENGTH.
YOU DID IT,YOU GOT RID OFALL THE FILM PEOPLE.
NOW ALL WE HAVE IS A TOWNCOVERED IN SH-- ( bleep !),THIS IS MUCH BETTER.
I COULDN'T HAVE DONE ITWITHOUT YOU, KYLE.
I'M SORRY I DRAGGED YOU TOALL THOSE INDEPENDENT FILMS.
THAT'S O.K., WENDY.
SOMETIMESI FORGET THAT,
Captioning made possible by COMEDY CENTRALINDEPENDENT FILMS ARE GREAT,
MOST OF THEMSUCK ASS.
AND I'VE LEARNEDSOMETHING TOO.
BEING A SELL-OUT IS SWEET,BECAUSE YOU MAKE A LOT OF MONEY,
AND WHEN YOU HAVE MONEY,
YOU DON'T HAVE TO HANG OUTWITH PO'-ASS LOSERS, LIKE YOU.
SCREW YOU GUYS,I'M GOIN' HOME.
Mr. Hankey saves South Park by coating it in shit.
A Terrance and Phillip special presentation: Not Without My Anus.x CLOSE
Cartman finds out the identity of his father.x CLOSE
A crime wave hits South Park, chickens are violated, and Barbrady resigns.x CLOSE
The boys find out what it means to be circumcised and they try to save Ike from that fate.x CLOSE
South Park citizens help the school nurse deal with a strange medical disorder.x CLOSE
Ned and Jimbo's cable show goes head to head in a rating war with Jesus and Pals.x CLOSE
It's up to Ms. Crabtree to save the entire busload of South Park Elementary School kids after a crash.x CLOSE
A ban on fireworks threatens the 4th of July festivities until the mayor comes up with a plan to put South Park on the map.x CLOSE
A film festival comes to South Park, and the town and Mr. Hankey are over-run by Hollywood types and the expanding population.x CLOSE
The kids' parents have only their best interests at heart when they arrange for the kids to be exposed to the chickenpox virus. The boys see things differently.x CLOSE
Chef tries to sell fudge cookies to visiting film buffs.x CLOSE
Mr. Hankey saves South Park by coating it in shit.x CLOSE
Mr. Hankey -- dried out from the pre-Christmas sun -- passes on.x CLOSE
The Sundance Film Festival decides to relocate to South Park.x CLOSE
Cartman thinks all independent films feature gay cowboys.x CLOSE
"Witness To Denial" isn't what Stan expected.x CLOSE
Fred Savage arrives in South Park, but no one cares.x CLOSE
The Sundance Film Festival organizers plan to use South Park for their own, twisted ends.x CLOSE
Chef introduces his Chocolate Salty Balls to the film festival crowd.x CLOSE
The boys find Mr. Garrison and Mr. Hankey in the sewer.x CLOSE