THIS SATURDAY, POX PRESENTSTHE MUSICAL EVENT OFTHE NEW MILLENNIUM.
YOU ALL REMEMBER PLAYING THERECORDER IN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL.
WELL, THIS SATURDAY,IN OKLAHOMA CITY
OVER 4 MILLIONTHIRD GRADE STUDENTS FROM ALLOVER THE COUNTRY
WILL GATHER IN ONE PLACEAND AT THE SAME TIME
TO PLAY"MY COUNTRY 'TIS OF THEE"
ON THEIR RECORDERS.
IT'S THE LARGEST THIRD GRADERECORDER CONCERT EVER !
SPECIAL GUEST CONDUCTORYOKO ONO.
AND WOODWIND VIRTUOSO KENNY G WILL LEAD THISFANTASTIC EVENT.
THIS SATURDAY AT11:00 EASTERN, 10:00 CENTRAL
THE WORLDWILL BE WATCHING.
OKAY, CHILDREN, WE'VE STILL GOTSOME TIME TO PRACTICE THE SONG
BEFORE WE LOAD UP THE BUSAND HEAD OUT FOR OKLAHOMA.
( groans & sighs )
NOW COME ON, THERE'S GONNA BEOVER 4 MILLION THIRD GRADERS
FROM ALL OVER THE COUNTRY, THERE
AND I WANNA MAKE SURE THATSOUTH PARK IS THE BEST, OKAY ?
AND-A ONE, AND-A TWOAND-A...
♪ ( cacaphony of playing )
Captioning made possible by COMEDY CENTRAL♪ ...OF LIBERTY--
♪ ...MY FATHER-- WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT ?
GODAMMIT, I DON'TTHINK YOU CHILDREN
HAVE BEEN WORKING ONYOUR FINGERING !
THAT'S NOT TRUE,MR. GARRISON.
KYLE WAS WORKING ON HISFINGERING WITH HIS MOMALL NIGHT LONG.
SHUT UP, FAT ASS !
NO, SERIOUSLY,KYLE'S MOM SAYS
KYLE'S GETTING REALLY GOODAT FINGERING.
SHUT UP, ERIC.
THERE'S GONNA BE4 MILLION CHILDREN
PLAYING THIS SONGAT THE SAME TIMEON THEIR RECORDERS
AND SO HELP ME GOD,SOUTH PARK ELEMENTARY
IS NOT GONNA BETHE ONLY ONES
THAT DON'T KNOW THE SONG.
TRY AGAIN !
AND-A ONE AND-A TWOAND-A...
( still out of rhythm )
M'KAY, THAT'SSOUNDING GREAT, KIDS.
SURE, IF YOULIKE THE SOUND
OF A PEACOCKGETTING IT'S NECK BROKEN.
M'KAY, KIDS,WE HAVE SOME NEWS.
THERE'S BEEN A TERRIBLEFLOOD IN OKLAHOMA, M'KAY.
SO THE 4 MILLIONRECORDER CHILDREN'S EVENT
IS BEING MOVEDTO ARKANSAS.
WHAT'S ARKANSAS,IS THAT A STATE ?
THE TRIP SHOULDN'TTAKE ANY LONGER,
BUT I'LL HAND OUTTHESE UPDATED CONTACT SHEETS
SO THAT YOUR PARENTS WILLKNOW WHERE YOU ARE, M'KAY.
MR. MACKIE, CAN ITALK TO YOU FOR A SECOND ?
MR. MACKIE, I CAN'TGO TO ARKANSAS.
SOMEBODY'S GONNA HAVE TOFILL IN FOR ME.
WHAT, WE CAN'T FINDANYBODY TO FILL INFOR YOU.
WHY CAN'T YOUGO TO ARKANSAS ?
ARKANSAS ISWHERE I GREW UP.
MY PARENTS LIVE THERE.
MY FATHER...STILL LIVES THERE.
WELL, DON'T YOUWANNA SEE THEM ?
I HAVEN'T SEEN MY FATHERFOR 23 YEARS.
UH, PERHAPS YOU SHOULDSIT DOWN, MR. GARRISON, M'KAY.
MR. GARRISON, I KNOW THIS ISVERY DIFFICULT, M'KAY.
BUT I MUST ASK:
IS THERE A HISTORY OFSEXUAL ABUSE IN YOUR FAMILY ?
THERE WAS MY UNCLE, RICHARD,HE, HE MOLESTED ME.
WHEN WAS THAT ?
SATURDAY... LAST--LAST SATURDAY.
HE'S A PARAPLEGIC,BUT HE--
M'KAY, ANDYOUR FATHER ?
HE MOLESTEDWHEN YOU WERE A BOY ?
( sobbing )
MR. GARRISON, I THINKWHEN WE GET TO ARKANSAS
YOU NEED TO SEEYOUR FATHER.
YOU NEED TO FACE THIS DEMONIN YOUR CLOSET, M'KAY.
DON'T LOOK AT ME.
I'LL GO ON YOUR BASTARD TRIPBUT JUST DON'T LOOK AT ME !
THAT WASPRETTY COOL.
A History of Sexual Abuse
Mr. Garrison has issues with going to Arkansas.
The boys are sent to the Costa Rican rainforest as a part of the Getting Gay with Kids choir tour.x CLOSE
The citizens of South Park are exploding randomly. Stan's dad is on the case.x CLOSE
Chef finally finds the girl of his dreams, but the boys feel like they've lost their best friend.x CLOSE
While camping on the banks of Starks Pond, the boys discover the last two Jakovasaurs left alive on the planet.x CLOSE
The boys coerce two of their reluctant classmates, Tweek and Craig, into a school yard fight.x CLOSE
Cartman sues Stan for sexual harassment.x CLOSE
Shelly babysits Cartman.x CLOSE
The ATF is stationed outside a town party and a standoff reminiscent of Waco is played out in South Park.x CLOSE
As all of South Park waits for the meteor shower to begin, Kyle and Ike go into the wilderness on a Jewbilee camping trip.x CLOSE
The boys are being plagued by the fifth graders and Pirate Ghosts in this haunting Halloween episode. Special guest: Korn.x CLOSE
Mr. Garrison has issues with going to Arkansas.x CLOSE
Cartman tries to find the "brown noise."x CLOSE
The whole world craps its pants.x CLOSE
The boys have a run-in with the New Yorkers.x CLOSE
Mr. Garrison confronts his father.x CLOSE
The boys challenge the New Yorkers' vocabularyx CLOSE
Mr. Garrison confronts his mother.x CLOSE
Yoko Ono is not a good public speaker.x CLOSE
Mr. Mackey tells Mr. Garrison Sr. that the right thing to do would be to molest his son.x CLOSE
Mr. Garrison tries to get his dad to molest him.x CLOSE